Diahz90 'Carpe Diem'

Foodsholic

2009-07-20T10:19:00.003+02:00

If there are two things I've always wanted to blog about, they will be about food and travel. A friend has already started a traveling blog wandergeek a few months ago and I am one of the contributors. Well, nothing much has been going on with the blog recently as all authors seem to be having pretty hectic life.

Here I want to introduce a new blog about food, www.foodsholic.blogspot.com. Just started and it will definitely be updated quite often. As of now, there are 3 authors contributing so I hope you guys enjoy reading foodsholic!

Ciao

Narcissism

2009-03-04T15:42:00.000+01:00

Have u ever wondered why others are so interested in brad pitt’s life but not in yours? Easy. Because he is Brad Pitt and you’re not..

I had this talk with a friend and colleague the other day.. discussed about things happening in the world lately (ritee..).. and we came to a conclusion that some people were just plain narcissistic.. we know, people need to be heard and be seen.. but we wonder, do ppl need to be heard and be seen that much? like a friend said, some are so eager to tell you about what's going on in their life they could even trick u into asking them questions about their life.. (really..? seriously..?)

So, here's the thing, people may not be all that interested in your life, you and your job, you and your partner, you and all the things happening in your life, again, unless you’re Brad Pitt or Beckham.. So, if u feel u're very successful now then glad to hear that.. but then again, that doesn’t mean we’re interested in knowing the details.. if u fail, it's ok, don't commit suicide because we probably don't even have enough time to gossip about u.. the last time we really had this commit-suicide-kinda-talk was only when heath ledger did.. so if u’re not him, stop acting like one..

See, people like us.. we barely have enough time to think about our own life and our closest relatives’ and friends' matters (don’t forget that on top of that, we still have all those interesting news on brad pitt & co.).. we just somehow, somewhat do not have enough time to be such busy-body checking out your lives.. don't be upset, this is just truth.. if we're interested, we'll ask.. even if we ask, that doesn't necessarily mean we're interested.. so please stop tricking people into asking or hearing about ur life.. we’re afterall human, we can be exhausted too..

Seriously, after realizing how annoying this could be.. let's start over if u ever thought i did such trick before, i swear it was never intentional.. ;P

2009-01-15T03:20:00.000+01:00

There are 3 things that I discovered lately..

Every problem has a solution, even if it doesn't, one just has to forgive oneself.

I believe, for some reasons, everyone should have a certain amount of ego, at the right place, at the right time. On the other side of the world, there are people with incredible amount of ego which is incredibly annoying. No matter how big one's ego is, one still has to say thank you or sorry. That's an unspoken rule for socially acceptable behavior. It's called etiquette.

Some people talk too much about the things they don't know much about.. They build assumptions.. they have their own knowledge which you have no idea where they receive it from.. Until the point that.. no, it's not that u feel like whacking them hard..
u just don't feel like talking to them any longer.. exhausting it is..

We're all human, we're flawed but really, some people just don't know when to stop.

New Blog

2008-12-10T02:57:00.001+01:00

A friend of mine started a blog about traveling and invited me as a contributor. You may call it a TRAVELog. But it's not just another Travelog. ;P

So, check it out here www.wandergeek.wordpress.com

The Trip...

2008-11-06T15:14:00.000+01:00

So here I am, back in spore.. feel totally great, heavier and braver than ever.. =P

Surabaya was surprising.. I mean, I was really surprised by the extraordinarily dry and hot weather.. also surprised by the food which was excellent.. the trip was pretty much like my nowadays infrequent visit to hometown.. everything was so well-provided, from food to transportation to accommodation..

Speaking of being braver.. I survived staying alone in a pretty big-ass room for more than 10 nights and I am very proud of that..=P when the receptionist said “ur room is a business room, number blah3.. “ I was like “what?!? I’m gonna be alone in the room so I prefer a junior room, the standard one.. can u please exchange that for me ?” receptionist: “sorry, no, we ran out of junior room..”

I was very disappointed and scared.. but u know, it's kinda true actually when ppl say that the thought is always scarier than the reality? turned out, it wasn’t that bad afterall.. my imagination did run wild a couple of times at night but since I had been avoiding watching horror movies and listening to ghost stories… I was doing just fine in the end.. =P

We made visits to places like House of Sampoerna and the active volcano Mount Bromo; watched sunrise, climbed up to see the crater and me rode a horse (ehem).. bfore I went there, one of my colleagues warned me that it’s very cold up there, around 5 degrees C.. I didn’t totally believe that inside my heart (who knew there was such a cold place in Indonesia?) so I bravely went there with a thin scarf ard my neck and lecture-theatre-jacket, if u know what I mean.. Jan, from Bangkok did it even more bravely, by wearing only a t-shirt covered with a shirt.. and there we were, shaking like nobody’s business.. I could assure u it was definitely below 10 deg C… damn..

The Mud Volcano.. don't get the smiles in the pic wrong, we truly feel sorry about it..

Bromo

From Far..

What’s new is I’ve got my allergy back again.. since my colleague in SUB, Ida, brought us to drink in Shangri-La, right before heading to Bromo, very late at night.. I totally sensed I was so gonna get my allergy back.. we had very cold alcoholic beverages and since u bond with others easier under alcohol, ida and I drank, talked and laughed like.. a lot.. and we had to talk n laugh very loudly to keep up with the live band.. my throat was totally drained away.. and I cough for the next 1000 years.. damn..

many thanks to Ida for bringing us around!

Oops, didn't say a word about work.. work was good anyway.. Ciao... =P

Oktoberfest 2008...

2008-10-08T13:43:00.000+02:00

There was a celebration of company’s Oktoberfest at Swiss Club last weekend.. and just like the way I expected it to be, there were lots of german foods (sausages, pork knuckles, roasted ox, breads, potatoes, u name it!), lots and lots of beers, coupled with bavarian-style live music and performances.. the tent could probably accommodate more than 5,000 people, there were other german companies who came to celebrate too like lufthansa and DHL.. down there in munich, the typical oktoberfest-tent (Hacker-Festzelt as they call it) could actually accommodate a lot more.. around 6 millions of people attending it in fact, definitely much more happening I reckon.. Here are some pictures we took...

The day before we're all like wondering what to wear and finally decided on "rainbow color" theme.. in the end apparently, boss' wife made the matching t-shirts for us.. these are some of us..

There were plenty of foods, guess the roasted ox hanging there explains all.. =P

And lots lots of beers!

Actually i'm not very sure the purpose of blowing this thing, some companies sent representatives and it seemed like the louder ones being cheered at while the soft ones got a boo, that's all..

The bosses and some of us

This is pretty much how the tent looks like.. and when we saw how big the crowd was, we're like nodding and "oh yea, that's what the matching t-shirts are for.."

Almost every 20 mins, the stage performers invited everybody to sing a song, which I’m not sure what it’s called (I was da-da-da-ing) made some cheers, gave toasts and drank together.. it’s probably to make the celebration more happening bcos people tend to get wild over the food.. or I guess, every time they made the cheers and toast thing, more than 300 litres of beer sold! Who knows? =P but anyway, i kinda enjoyed the whole thing, bcos I didn’t get to celebrate Oktoberfest when i was there but heard abt it from my german friends..

I'll be on my very first work-trip in a few days time till the end of october, which pretty much excited me but i guess i'm chickened out over staying alone in a hotel room... i know! don't laugh.. so, till then peeps, take care...

Ciao!

One thing they have in common..

2008-09-16T10:55:00.000+02:00

So, after living in a working life for a short period of time, here's that one thing I've discovered (warning! it doesn't have anything do with the work or the work life itself).. speaking of people who work and take public transportation to work every morning.. there's one big thing most of them share in common, and that is.......... they're so afraid of not getting a seat to rest their lazy butts on their way to work..

now, if u feel offended bcos every morning apparently, u pretty much do the same thing.. here's an advice u'd probably like to hear.. it is okay not getting a seat in the bus/train!! seriously, u'd be sitting the whole day from 9 to 5 anyway.. and the good thing abt not being so irritating is that, u can eventually have a peace of mind for not worrying about not getting a seat later in the bus/train once u wake up..

but for those who are very good at pretending to be asleep once u get the seat so that u're not obliged to give ur seat to those with special needs! whoever u are, good luck, what goes around comes around..

see, this is one example why i couldn't get what some ppl are thinking sometimes..

Trip to Hong Kong...

2008-08-28T09:16:00.000+02:00

Disneyland was so much fun it reminded me of Legoland in denmark.. foods on the street somehow tasted way better than the restaurants’ (or maybe it’s the fun that counted).. exactly the same time last year, i promised not to travel in hot hot summer yet i did it again..

People say hong kong is a place to shop, and yes they’re right, if u think they’re wrong, u’re just on the wrong spot so keep walking keep looking.. i promise u pretty much found any designer brands u couldn’t even see in Singapore..

Overall, the trip was like a breath of fresh air.. =P

Look at the crowd! the night's always young in Hong Kong

The chaos

"Wellcome" to Hong Kong

The train to Disneyland!!

When the Parade was about to start...

Mickey & Minnie, Goofy

The Little Mermaid

World's tallest outdoor seated Buddha statue, Tian Tan Buddha or the Big Buddha

Ciao... =P

Truth is...

2008-08-27T20:39:00.000+02:00

I actually have many things to write because a lot have been going on (yea right...).. like the graduation and trips and all that..but for now, let me just write this instead..

This is what i’ve learned about people's behaviour.. and i know a thing, or even two or three things about it.. some people swing their arms so much and so hard while walking, it hurts others.. i understand, we need to swing our hands for biomechanical efficiency whatsoever.. i know left leg forward right arm backward and that’s how the torque from body and legs counter each other.. but seriously, here are the blatant truths u probably need to know, u take much more space when the arms are swung that hard and that much, u even hit people sometimes and when u walk like that, u totally lose ur cool..

When driving, do not continually step on the brake.. the brake is not there for u to tone ur muscles.. and not there to make me throw up my lunch.. seriously, if u like to stop that often, take the bus.. and if u like to speed up yet aren’t sure how to stop at the right time, don’t even start driving.. don’t step on the brake and change ur mind, and then step on it again, and change ur mind.. fiuhhh.. like ellen said, “nobody said they’re bad drivers – especially the bad drivers”

Not talking is quiet but whispering is not.. covering ur mouth with a menu draws even more attention just like whispering does.. it forces us to pay attention because whatever is being said has gotta be interesting and scandalous..

I’ll write more when i see more.. ciao.. =P

The Nature...

2008-06-17T11:50:00.001+02:00

Still, by all means, the most beautiful..

The "Experience Machine"...

2008-04-28T15:21:00.000+02:00

"Suppose there were a machine that would give you any experience you desire. Super duper neuropsychologists could stimulate your brain so that you would think and feel you were writing a great novel, or making a friend, or reading an interesting book. All the time, you would be floating in a tank, with electrodes attached to your brain. Should you plug into this machine for life, preprogramming your life experiences? If you are worried about missing out on desirable experiences, we can suppose that businesses and enterprises have researched thoroughly, the lives of many others. You can pick and choose from their large library or smorgasbord of such experiences, selecting your life's experiences for, say, the next two years. Of course while in the tank you won't know that you are in there; you'll think that it's all actually happening. Others can also plug in to have experiences they want, so there's no need to stay unplugged to serve them."

(Robert Nozick, in J. Glover, ed., Utilitarianism and Its Critics, p.58)

The lecturer's question was, "Do you hook up?"

I straightaway went "No, crazy if I would like to.."(actually it's even a little crazy already that I typed what's in my lecture notes in this blog!) but here's another thought.. isn't it all just about human thoughts? it's like... most of the time, we even choose to see only what we love to see.. and we don't see what we don't feel like seeing even if it's as big as an elephant right in front of our very eyes.. do we not do that sometimes??

and i'm just bored... ciao =P

On bad days...

2008-03-26T17:31:00.000+01:00

I twist and turn on my bed, instead of sleeping tightly, some things come across and scare the hell out of me.. these 3 months have been the fastest so far, with a fine repetition each and every single day and night, I almost give up..

Occasionally too I type for hours, I delete, I type again.. the words on screen seem so real yet incorrect.. the words from my mouth don’t sound any better.. try to predict sometimes, I see nothing.. i think I’m in a very serious situation, like on the brink of a big failure yet I don’t even see why I would fail myself to that extent..

I soundly wish to have another version of life to move into and disappear, start all over where nobody doesn’t even know or judge me.. I just soundly wish there’d be no time when I think I have been living in a wrong life..

My 22nd...

2008-03-18T13:56:00.000+01:00

I am very grateful for my 22^nd..

For I have been living a glowing life, for I always have good and supportive people around me, for I have always been given blesses and gifts and for my birthday always be remembered.. =)

Birthday, to me, is not just like another day.. it is always special in its way.. like, I get to know that I’m always remembered, even though it’s just once a year thing.. I get calls, smses, cards, emails etc wishing me a happy day.. I get to have the reason to gather and have a full of laugh dinner with the people that I love.. I even get wonderful presents.. It’s really not just another day..

I browsed through my 21^st which I spent in denmark.. I couldn’t help but smile when I reminisced, i thought I would end up spending my birthday alone at that time cos nobody was supposed to know, yet some people just knew and celebrated for me.. simple yet unforgettable..

This year, it’s as special, I spent my early birthday dinner at rendezvous hotel (the padang food was very nice!) with my brother, cousin, and some friends.. and I got this Birthday “Surprise” from trio “Lydia Lysia Evan” at night… every year somehow I always knew about the surprises yet I’m still as happy to get the surprise.. hmm.. and on the day itself, I got a small celebration at my beloved engineering faculty (yes, I have classes on my birthday) from some friends.. and the night of my birthday, I have a Korean dinner with chengto.. Oh and thanks for alllll the people who remembered...

Pictures:

@ Rendezvous Restaurant...

The "birthday surprise" @ PGP... with super cute CUP-CAKES!

Lydia Lysia Diah (it rhymes!) + Evan...

@ Techno Edge Engineering Faculty

Togi, our favourite Korean Restaurant

I realized that I did give credits to the people who gave me gifts on my 21st.. i would do the same thing this time.. =P.. as usual, my bag supplier (a.k.a BROTHER) got me a Fendi Baguette which i've been wanting lately.. chengto got me a rose gold plating watch which, again, i've been wanting lately.. my belt supplier, cousin JK, this year made a difference by giving me a Coach pouch, which i've been liking lately as well (now, i'm feeling bad) and the Zara voucher and loccitane set were from fenny and pegrina.. nice of them, i've got to shop soon then.. =P

Guolong gave me a bear, which is now in Lydia's room (long story) so i can't take the picture.. hmm.. and the 501 must visit destination book was from Sri Dj.. when i unwrapped it, i straightaway went to European& Middle East section.. I was like "argh, i should have gone here.. or... there.. or there.. there.. there!" or better one "yes, luckily, i went there.. apparently it's one of the 501 must-visit places"..

And btw.. have i mentioned that i have these two bitches in my life? both with initial S (Sri who forgot to remove price tag on my 21st gift n Suai who didnt even remember my 21st)? well, basically today i got this call from PGP management saying that there's a package for me.. i went there and right away recognized those fat handwriting, right away knew it's something slutty too inside.. (La Senza ppl! and it's from those two..i can even imagine their evil smiling now) opened it, turned out, the thing was even sluttier than i thought.. with a Merry Christmas card, how nice people!! a MERRY CHRISTMAS card! (see what u get when u know ur friends for a long time) with a small fat handwriting at the side saying "this is unavoidable, we forgot to buy u a birthday card.."

and now I want to depressingly say something out loud ......
" I am OLDDDD!!!"

Ciao

One evening in Paris...

2008-03-06T17:31:00.001+01:00

Andreas, Sarah and I were walking around Quartier Latin, looking for a nice place to sit and drink.. We found this place called Beamish, they even had outdoor seats and beer promotion.. perfect it was.. we sat, ordered some drink and started to chat.. Andreas started to talk about how he honestly didn’t think he would still be in touch with any of us because it simply just couldn’t be possible, very honest yet can’t be more correct, I agreed with him.. sarah talked about how much she’d really love to stay in france because she spoke the language fluently after being there for one year.. and there I was, talking about how afraid I was to go back to reality..

It was predictable, it was foreseen yet I have and still enjoy the fantasy sometimes..

Today's dinner simply gave me back the feel.. with a bunch of nice people, complete home-cooked meal, wine and jazz.. fantasy, eventually, is heartbreaking..

Oh btw, A Very Happy birthday to Marlinnn!! Ciao.. =P

If only people know...

2008-03-05T13:59:00.000+01:00

I missed one of my ex bosses, he suddenly just made sense..

His favorite saying was "your monkey is your monkey and therefore, my monkey is my monkey!!!"

Jumping to the next step is harder than ever...

2008-02-20T14:55:00.001+01:00

Some choose to be ignorant for a little while.. some bring it closer and face it as if there's no tomorrow.. some lose directions and find themselves have nothing to grasp.. whichever way, it doesn't seem to be the time to feel fairly peaceful or freer than before...

There's nothing u can do that can't be done.. u've just got to be brave...

The Cycle...

2008-01-09T19:56:00.001+01:00

Are u afraid of repetition? Are u afraid of feeling bored about the things u like at the moment?

I am very certain everybody has heard about how high the divorce rate has been recently.. I mean, it was just yesterday when I heard that a friend’s friend was filing a divorce and that wasn’t even the first time.. I couldn’t help but wonder.. was it because of the non-existence of the novelty that once the couple had? or, people nowadays just couldn’t afford to take the time to solve problems, they gave it up instead? or, people are really in need of breaking the cycle, the repetition in life?

Whatever questions came to my mind.. unfortunately, the answers to myself seemed to be a YES.. that was upsetting..

Let’s take a very simple example of ourselves.. certainly there should be a time when u feel that u really need to start studying again or quit working, switch jobs, get out the city or worse, break up with ur current girl/boyfriend.. i’m expecting u to nod when u read this.. sorry to say that everybody does that, including myself at times.. we’d say out loud to the world that we’re just bored!!

I remember I was so happy being admitted to NUS.. so glad to go to lectures in the first week of school.. and BANG! On the fourth week, I found myself skipping classes, overslept and did all those sinful stuffs, until only god-knows-when.. I just wasn’t that excited anymore.. there’s no more engine to drive me “alive”..

Somebody told me, if we really think abt it.. actually there’s something special about being bored.. if in the first place u never have that thing u’re bored of, how on earth will ever be bored of it? and if u come to lose it, u may want it back again, not so soon but u may one day.. more often than not, we just don’t realize that we’re sick of the thing we once wanted so badly.. remember how cruel life was when u’re unemployed? And how blissful life was when u got ur first job interview? but how bored u are now in the office complaining at the same time? We simply take many many things for granted..

I guess he’s true.. it may be harder to see things that way.. but I say it is something worth looking at..

Till then.. Ciao.. =)

New Year's Resolutions...

2008-01-02T17:57:00.000+01:00

Well, it’s that time of a new year start again to create the magic list.. the commitment or “life projects” to be fulfilled.. I even browsed back to my last year’s list and felt so impressed that I actually did fulfill almost perfectly.. Look, to me there’s no right or wrong in creating the list.. as long as it’s socially responsible, not too selfish and advantageous.. (ambiguous? but I hope u get what I mean =P).. so, to cut it short.. I do have some thoughts of the important things to be done this year.. some of which I’d share.. =)

1. Be environmentally responsible (including eat less meat)..
2. Learn something new
3. Help others
4. Get organized
5. Enjoy life more
6. Be hardworking
7. Exercise regularly
8. Continue to learn how to cook
9. Save some money (hopefully)
10. Tame the bulge

I actually just wish to be resolved to meet most of my goals.. for instance, I hope I’d not again fall into i'll-start-to-jog-next-month or i'll-start-my-diet-next-monday traps.. In other words, I can’t leave my time-frame too wide open.. maybe I should start setting the dates for mini-goals.. hmmm.. sounds pretty good, doesn’t it?

150 watches, 150 sets of stationaries, game gifts etc to wrap.. what a long day..

What a big relief! (dinner after gracehaven new year's celebration).. no photography and videography allowed there so i've got zilch of the party..

New Year's Eve

The chefs always have the luxury to take pictures together =P

All of us in 2008

The most effective way to get everybody to finish the leftover.. =P

Anyways, in this new year, 2008.. I’d really love to wish everybody in good health and may everybody be blessed with abundant joys and happiness.. =)

Till then, Ciao… =)

Holiday...

2007-12-26T10:12:00.000+01:00

The long awaited and “well-deserved” break is finally here?? Believe me, some nasty people don’t really think we deserve this holiday!!!

It’s been more than 2 weeks since my very last day of exam and what have been happening…??
- Final Year Project (FYP), which doesn’t seem to go that smooth, changes here and there, manufacturing faulty… the list goes on and on..
- Workshops by the Office of Student Affairs, which have taken up most of my time too.. all of them were very inspiring though..
- Magical Workshops 4, the christmas party for the physically disabled @ Spore Cheshire Home like usual.. and additional outing @ Vivocity this year was a success.. it really brought smiles to our clients’ faces, literally..
- Gracehaven Salvation Army New Year’s Celebration.. this has been cool so far, did huge shopping starting from buying 150 watches, 90 sets of stationeries, game gifts, foods etc etc etc.. those are all for the orphanage, juvenile delinquents, those whose parents are imprisoned and so on.. this is my first voluntary activity without registering my name under any NUS Clubs, in other words we’ll do everything by ourselves.. the kind plan came from a bunch of friends and knowing that things have been smooth so far is really amazing.. the fund raise is surprisingly huge too.. I’m just so glad to have known many generous people who have big heart.. hehe.. at the end of the day, the talking is just the talking.. what matters is the doing.. =P any kind souls who want to donate, please contact me.. haha.. (I’m serious though) =P
- Christmas Celebration.. the first one was in Marlin’s.. that was great.. good friends, funny games and good food.. Christmas Eve yesterday was well spent too.. had dinner @Oasis in Hyatt and caught the movie I am Legend afterwards..
- Some unnecessary things did happen too.. such as me falling down in a very unmannered way while walking on slippery floor (all bcos of FYP) passing through a bunch of engineering fellows who were discussing and being free-entertained by me.. had a very bad headache which was extremely weird since I didn’t remember sth bad happened to my head.. weird weird weird!

Well, that pretty much sum up what I’ve done in the past 2 weeks or so.. strange because it feels so packed.. usually during holiday, I was completely bumming around lazily doing unproductive stuffs, eating and things like that.. apparently at one point in ur life, u don’t even have life anymore.. =P eh, I mean, u don’t even have a break (that u actually deserve)… but I’m really happy to be able to start my voluntary activities again.. not very happy to do fyp of course, but I have to, so it’s ok.. life goes on.. =P

Anyways, some pictures of late..

Christmas Party @Sherwood Tower by Marlin

Three of us, Lysia, Lydia and I =)

Vivocity Outing by NUS Rotaract Club

Dinner @Oasis, Hyatt

Last but not least, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year..!!

Ciao.. =)

Happy Thanksgiving...!

2007-11-29T16:22:00.000+01:00

It’s thanksgiving today (I assume it’s today even though some celebrated last Thursday, I was having exam.. blah) and the year is again coming to an end.. this is how fast and scary how time flies.. yesterday night, I went recalling about the things that happened in the past 11 months... I simply felt very grateful for everything that has come to me in 2007.. and even if i had to think again about what happened in 2006, again, I merely felt very thankful that I finally found the reasons of what was happening.. thought of it, yes, it was bad but nothing was that bad after all..

Of course some shits did happen, even in europe and all that… then again, it somewhat just feels like nothing to me at the moment.. and I’m just glad that everything happened.. if I never left my $700 eurailpass ticket in the dormitory, I would never know that I’ve met such an angel whom without hesitate night travelled all the way from Odense to Copenhagen just to deliver the ticket to me, who even said “It’s ok, that’s what friends are for.. have a nice trip..”.. if I never wanted to bike in Odense, I would never know there was such a helpful person as Andreas.. u know what I mean? Just as the saying goes, every cloud has a silver lining.. believe me, even losing something could sometimes lead u to better days.. I realize we just have to accept and learn sth out of it at the end of the day.. nothing to be frown upon that long..

Yes, perhaps being in Europe is on my first list to be thanked about this year. (I have my own complete list, u should write urs too cos we’re talking abt thanksgiving ppl! =P). next thing to be thanked, of course it’s for all the people, family and friends who have been very kind to me.. and I’m grateful for our successful robotic project..

I just like it because I’m feeling that I’ve never been better… =) I hope u too..

On another note, there’s something more important to be blogged about.. a new NUS message that popped up currently on my screen every time I log in is “Fight Global Warming”.. yea, what I mean is, it’s time to stop being ignorant.. please do this people, of course if u care enough.. =P Exam’s finally ended for me.. feels very glad to have gone through the sickening mugging period healthily.. =P

A surprising bouquet that brightened up my boring reading week ;)

Oh well, how boring could it be? I had 3 funny and “crappy” friends who always mugged together with me during the week! haha.. =P till then, take care…

Ciao…

Back then and now...

2007-11-09T18:11:00.000+01:00

The winners and prizes of the champion stacker competition has been announced!

As predicted, we won the 2nd place.. but hold on.. we also won the "BEST DESIGN AWARD" which means we actually get the same amount of prize as the 1st winner's…how much u ask?hmm.. I don't think I'll tell here bcos.. o well.. it's so small..! but it's fine.. we never knew they would actually give us money for winning the competition.. so what was the competition all about u ask? well.. I should say we did it for nothing but grades, module credits and PRIDE.. =P that's all..

So life recently has been treating me quite well.. project was pretty tough but I've met friendly n nice people to work with, which honestly seldom happened in the past 3 years haha.. except my HR group mates who are really cool and oh, my denmark mates.. =P anyways, exams are just around the corner.. reading week is one week away, exam is two weeks away.. simply put, I am not ready..

I am just so scared of one module, mechanics of solids.. this technical stuff, it's seriously not my cuppa tea.. and the fact that this is already my final year, which means my only chance to pull up my miserable grade.. (I mean it!) well.. life.. life… sometimes think of it, I just don't get it why I'm stuck in mechanical engineering.. I don't think I foresaw myself studying this stuff when I was 15.. the time when I was so innocently excited of being a psychologist, psychiatrist or a psychoanalyst (don't ask me the difference =P).. when I was 10 I wanted a camera so badly I cried.. so the first expensive thing that I bought for myself after breaking my piggy bank was a camera..! photographer should be a very interesting job, just so I thought… (don't laugh.. kids do dream).. can u imagine it's like every time I went to book stores, I went straight to those sections and browsed for some interesting stuffs.. I don't even have the urge to go to the library nowadays.. see the difference? u get what I mean?

Well, back then it was.. as time passes, things are becoming very different.. they're so different that sometimes I don't even remember what I see beforehand.. I don't even know what I love doing, what I'm good at, what are my interests..

Basically i lose, in both what i like and what i don't like.. simply put, pathetic..

Good weekend..! Ciao =P

The I-CUTE Day...!

2007-11-03T04:06:00.000+01:00

First of all, pardon me bcos I’m so gonna brag about i-cute!! Basically we did it! I still hardly believe it finally ends.. well, not totally finished as we’re still left with the report to submit and final presentation… but the good thing is, at least we can boast a bit in the final presentation.. =P

We went early in the morning to run final testing before the competition which was @4pm.. it was a real demoralizing morning as i-cute never really did clamp 9 blocks and nicely put them on the platform as we expected during the testing.. (btw, this robotic competition was about clamping as many blocks as possible and stack them on a platform within 3 minutes).. the clamping suddenly became so jerky and shaky last minutes, we called it a “Parkinson’s disease”.. if Parkinson’s disease happened, we’re very confused of what to do to fix it cos it could be due to many problems.. so we basically did every single thing we could do but it still didn’t help much.. so we’re like… ok.. that’s it.. our hard work would finally end just.. like.. that… instead of grabbing blocks, the retarded clamps might just drop or sweep them away..

Last minute, we decided to “gamble”.. implemented another possible solution.. which was very risky it might just destroy the whole plan of our Programming.. and ended up with grabbing ZERO blocks, being laughed at and us crying our eyes out.. what a risk to take i know! but since the parkinson’s disease was so hard to solve.. we all voted for a “YES” to just take the risk.. turned out, we did the right thing cos the newly added battery helped preventing the jerky motion and the clamp grabbed super nicely, tightly and elegantly.. haha..

I think, my heart beats were three times as much within those 3mins.. i could even feel my hands and legs trembling and I’m not exaggerating.. it’s so intense.. we wanted it to happen so badly!! We wanted i-cute to run only once on the arena and left everybody with the “wow” feelings.. of course we’re allowed to do it again if we failed the 1^st attempt, but that just would not be as nice… right?? So, we grabbed 9.. there was one group who grabbed 12 (fyi, there were groups who couldn’t even grab 1 =P), but… they’re not totally autonomous (whereas i-cute was, no download cable, no wire from power supply, no nothing!) and I heard they did it only after the 3^rd attempt.. besides, i-cute was requested to be kept inside the design lab in NUS.. so we’re pretty proud of i-cute.. I mean, very proud.. =P

Mostly I’m feeling very satisfied.. bcos all our night and day shifts doing the project finally paid off.. we either woke up at 5am or stayed at school and came back at 9am in the morning.. the endless one-after-another-problem which totally drained us away seemed to be memorable now.. =P this, I would say, the only project which has taken the most energy n time..

Well, enough said.. just look at the pictures and there’s a video this time.. enjoyyyy =P

The iCute group @ our 2nd Home in Pavillion, NUS =)

The cutest robot girl, i-cute... =P Photo shot with supervisor and the group who grabbed 12..

Celebrated @Bosses Restaurant, Vivocity.. went for a pool game, arcade and drinks after that..

Last but not least, check this video! or this link:
iCute Competition Day

We were the only group that made people went "waaahhh..".. "hahahah"... "aaaah...hmm.." Ciao.. =)

The Robot...

2007-10-29T03:58:00.000+01:00

I've never really wanted to talk about my robotic project.. because.. it is such a pain in the ass, it has caused so much trouble, it also has created many sleepless nights this semester for us all.. the competition is like a few days away yet things start to fall apart.. clamping servo spoilt, lifting mechanism doesn't work consistently, handyboard overheated.. u name it, i-cute has it (yea, we name it "i-cute", everybody says it's cute and the size is real petite compared to other robots)..

Perhaps luck would help this time.. but i don't think i-cute really has it in the past few weeks.. i can't believe it's that fragile.. i just can't believe this is happening.. i can't believe i'm sad whenever looking at it.. *sigh*

Ciao..

The Old Messages...

2007-10-14T17:45:00.001+02:00

I have this old (yet durable) nokia phone which has been accompanying me for quite some years.. it was with me when I graduated from senior high school, when I was in Malaysia, in Singapore, in bintan, in denmark, in singapore again.. u see, how loyal this phone has been.. anyways, since coming back from denmark, my sleeping problem of having to twist and turn for up to 2 hours before sleeping was back! So yesterday, the same thing happened, I couldn’t sleep, I looked at that phone who’s always lying on my bed cos I only used it when my current phone died or when my new phone was stolen last year (shit!).. thought of deleting useless files/messages inside.. I ended up reading the old messages cos the first one actually caught my attention.. =P and I don’t know why I really wanna blog this.. haha..

U might not understand, so don’t try too hard..
“kepot kui.. blm packing tp bs jln2 ke brastagi haha ya udah gw nanya bege dolo.. loe harus ikut meskipun cuma nampang muka 2-3mins”
“diah, td mother theonis salah ngasi info, kalo masuk lewat pizza, lewatilah da shanghai, msk ke kompleks, nampak gedung bulet2, bersinar2.. ntar telpon aja..”
“diah bsr, diah kcl..ntr malam jadi ga? Jam brp kita mulai show? Urutannya kae kmrn ya.. btw diariku tolong diisi haha”
“diah bawa aqua cup ya.. haus.. masukkin ke tas.. haha”

Then I started to read another ones.. (I ended up reading all anyway).. they were all somehow funny when I imagined the person typing those smses….
“ Miz u di!”
“ayang, jam brp jemput gw?”
“happy birthday.. mai kong ce2 liao deh.. semoga bisa dapet uang, cinta.. dan sri darling senantiasa di samping.. muahahaha..”
“sunhong cinta, bae2 dsana..”
“haha ada donk.. Cuma lage sumpek aja haha… ya dah, u have fun, jgn kangen2 ma gw di..”
“di, alamat rumah loe dimane” (after knowing me for like 15 years, what a good friend)
“u at where now ar?” (she’s just trying to be funny =P)

These were the messages I didn’t even know when would be the next time I got them..
“hi diah, what about having a drink tomorrow evening at six? At quartier latin..”
“hi diah, when will u be in paris? I’ll be there next tues-friday.. we should grab some beers.. see you..”
“my friends and I will be waiting in front of Notre Dame at six sharp, see you there..”

I realized I missed them all so dearly.. I couldn’t help but turn the phone off and delete nothing… laughed instead..

Selamat Hari Raya! Happy Holiday, Happy Weekend! Ciao…

Do you...?

2007-09-24T05:08:00.000+02:00

There was this event @ The Arts House at Old Parliament.. browsed through the art pieces created by offenders while serving their sentences, seriously, I would never think they’re the people who were imprisoned before.. besides and in fact, they were born with such gorgeous talents.. yesh! I was surprised by their art works.. nonetheless, it dawned on me that these ex-offenders couldn’t possibly escape the society’s judgments by passing themselves off as the “normal ones” while they're not according to our biased definitions of being "normal" .. they should have been considered apart from others in the crowd and looked different somewhat, just and just because they had prison record..

Totally, it was stunning.. I mean, if u ever thought how useless these people were to the society, u might want to think twice after checking out the exhibition.. I had a lot of thoughts running in my mind for instance, how much energy it actually took them to change? Some people just couldn’t be bothered to take their time to reflect and decide to change, if u know what I mean.. but these people did and they made it..

Perhaps the urge to be a changed person is stronger inside these people than that inside us.. why? maybe we do not make such huge a flaw that could alienate ourselves from the world.. I mean, we don’t need to put the effort to win back what we once have.. we don’t really know how painful it is to completely lose our loved ones.. or how aching it is to be pushed far away only bcos we've made a mistake once.. well, I suddenly feel so ordinary.. bcos u know what? That doesn’t even mean we’re morally better-off as a person.. we don’t even think that there's a need to change.. and the worst is, how self-centered we are at times..

So there I was, looked around, thought of it.. when walking out of the Arts House, I saw people painting and writing on the wall.. motivating words, admirations or messages to show that they were there to appreciate.. I held a marker pen, thought for a second.. there’s something I really wanted to write..

“The good thing about life is that… people change..”

Happy Mid-Autumn festival..!! =P

Ciao..

Messy Life...

2007-09-18T18:31:00.000+02:00

There have been too many things in my mind lately.. the things that should be done, the shouldn’ts, the things that I can’t shake off my mind, the things that make me happy n sad, the things that I miss so badly..

Things happen for reasons.. I kinda believe in this saying now.. what used to be too hard for me to comprehend have actually started to tell one by one.. I miss some of my pasts yet I don’t wanna turn back time.. I kinda like the world I’m living in at this moment yet I keep comparing the past and the present..

Whenever I talk, wherever I go, whomever I meet.. I keep wondering why things can be that different in two places.. the things they ask, the things they’re interested in, the things they enjoy, the personality.. even trivial remarks they pass to me are so different.. just one question, why?

U may see me smile and laugh but I really hate myself for endlessly comparing my life in denmark to what I’m having right now.. u may not hear me say this in reality but I really miss everything abt it.. u may think I’m such a freak who doesn’t know how to get over but the thing is, what remains in mind is always much more beautiful than what’s happening right before my very eyes..

Every so often, I even laze about and lose the direction of what I’m supposed to do.. Monday to Friday, morning to evening, I seem to have plenty of time yet I find myself so lack of time.. I’ve spent half of this semester worrying about my passport which is expiring soon yet the indo embassy doesn’t allow me to renew, I go back and forth trying to convince them and do whatever it takes.. how can I not miss denmark? and I’m so sick of sitting in front of my laptop making drawings using solidworks, even worse, when I have to edit again and again once I show them to the supervisor.. I feel that everything I try to solve lately is just trivial matters that have been deliberately made complicated for no reasons.. besides, I feel that I’m totally back in the place where people seem to be having a thought that the world just revolves around them.. in other words, they think they’re always the main interests of the topic on the table.. u think how can I not hate it?

Well, this is what happens when people mix two worlds in one life.. we just can’t have both.. and for once, I feel that my life has been pretty messy…

I’m loving this blog.. I feel relieved after writing this.. =P

Anyways, it was such a great experience to freelance as an interpreter in Batam.. stayed in a decent resort, ate decent foods that we've been craving for.. and nice outing too! =P

Holiday Inn Batam Resort and Delima Seafood..

Edina, me, Patrick, Erick

Catching up on weekends

Gathering + Dinner + LS & SM Birthday Celebration

Ciao...

The Phases...

2007-08-28T18:53:00.000+02:00

I recall in one of the classes that I attended in Odense, we’re given a talk about the phases of cultural adjustment.. Virtually, everybody who lived abroad went through these distinct phases of cultural adjustment..

- Preliminary: before everything happened, as such, it’s about the preparation of the journey.. Exciting? Yes! Exhausting?? Yes! I remember there were so many things to settle I was even an inch away to lose the excitement..

- Initial euphoria: Began when I stepped on Europe for the first time, namely in Amsterdam.. and when i saw copenhagen and odense! met new people, attended classes for the first time.. the list went on and on..

- Irritability: The initial excitement started to wear off… nonetheless, I didn’t recall there was such a huge problem on that.. maybe it was only about the weather that irritated me quite much…

- Gradual Adjustment: when everything became so familiar I didn’t even realize it’s happening..

- Adaptation and biculturalism: I felt as a part of it.. I had my own favorite places to go to.. activities for my spare time.. I treated myself foods that I loved to eat.. basically I was already comfortable with the host culture..

- Re-entry phases: when returning to homeland.. it can be the most painful phase of all.. excited about sharing experiences, realized that u’ve changed in a way u couldn't explain.. but in one way or another, u're just forced to change back.. bcos u're now back in a place where everything seemed to be at standstill when u're not around..

The speaker said we’d find ourselves going through that cycle all over again once we returned to homeland.. I guess she’s true.. I write this because distinctly, I’m finding myself at the stage of “Irritability” at the moment.. sighhhh...

Pictures: Barcelona in Spain..

“Traveling – it leaves u speechless then turns u into a storyteller” Ibn Battuta

Life's back to normal...!!

2007-08-15T08:21:00.000+02:00

I stay in PGP, go to the campus by NUS shuttle bus, eat at Engineering canteen most of the time.. yea, that normal.. 7 months feels so short a time.. I mean, I can even remember very clearly the smell of the newly checked in room in PGP.. and I’ve been asked questions like “how did it feel to leave denmark?”.. “how do u feel to come back here to nus again?”.. “how’s life treating u there in denmark? Was it better than here?”… hmm..

To be frank, after stepping on nus again, after attending my first week’s lectures and after the first meeting with my FYP supervisors, everything is so normal.. and boring.. I wonder where’s that missing feeling due to not being here for the past 7 months? there’s nothing like that.. so being there in denmark was like being in another world living another kind of life, a more exciting life..

“Prototype development of an EEG based mental fatigue screening system”.. That’s my FYP project title which honestly, has totally freaked me out.. I just don’t understand what was I thinking, it’s my first choice, yes, nobody forced me I chose it!..

Another thing is, it’s amazing that I sweat like all the time.. even without doing anything vigorous at all like sitting on the bench waiting or queuing for foods.. don’t u think it’s bloody hot recently?? are we actually living in a huge micro-oven??

I spent the first 3 days in PGP without internet connection.. I didn’t even know whom to thank for the trouble.. maybe it’s the line connection in my room, maybe it’s my laptop which was configured by the Danish staff in the Syddansk Uni.. in order to get things done faster, I complained to PGP Management and reconfigured my laptop at the same time.. =P why? there were two things for sure, we’d never make it to study in NUS without internet connection.. and spending 3 days in NUS without internet connection was like spending a week in a forest without fire.. =P u know how hard it was??

I guess it's time to post my overdue eurotrip pictures.. i'll start from Paris in France.. enjoy =P

Musee Du Louvre

The View from Notre Dame
Tour Eiffel
Château de Versailles

The most prestigious and broadest avenue in Paris, Avenue des Champs-Élysées (fyi, i risked my life taking this pic =P)

Ciao...

Easier said than done...

2007-08-10T12:31:00.001+02:00

So lately, the hottest topic has been about this friend who once left the group but for one reason or another, she just had to come to us again after 2 years of losing contact.. So, u can roughly imagine the situation happening here, thinly veiled sarcasms mostly everywhere and constant rehashing of her so-called sins followed by the never-ending apologies from her.. bottom line is, some of us don’t seem to totally get behind it though deeply we understand how situations had gone awry for her..

I don’t think I can afford to be that sarcastic towards her anyway and I just don’t know why.. it’s more like I’ve been the one defending her when others try to corner her.. maybe that’s because all these while we’ve always been in a very good term.. or maybe, I really think she’s very fun to be with.. I am indeed very happy to see her again like I always used to.. but even so, I’ve been questioning why others were that bothered, it’s as if they’re hurt so badly.. maybe it’s because I wasn’t here so my life wasn’t actually affected directly by her sudden disappearance, it wasn’t that big a deal to me..

Trying to put myself in others’ shoes, I’ve been thinking, what if I were to be one of “the others”? first…. most probably I’d be the most sarcastic one.. =P secondly, perhaps I’d not even want to listen to her explanation.. then again, being the way it is now, I’m relieved bcos I don’t have to go through it considering I’ve skipped that part where “the others” are still in now, and I’ve come out the other side better than ever..

But the bottom line is, I’m really grateful that I wasn’t here at that time bcos most probably I’d not be able to forgive her, nor wanting to see her as often as I do now.. who can mend a broken glass? u tell me..

Took early morning flight back to

singapore

(I’m all sleepy n tired now).. =P and of course, I had real good times there in medan!!

Some pictures that i've got.. =P

and this is my favourite..

Ciao...

Time of our lives...

2007-08-06T19:40:00.000+02:00

Sitting there, Story-telling, laughing together, reminiscing.. and facing those that I’ve known forever.. have I told u? that is the time of my life.. we don’t talk about deep stuffs and serious future plans.. nor making cheap promises about how our friendship would last forever.. but if I count carefully, it’s been 9 years since we’re placed in the same class in that school..

Without us realizing it, there are things that actually can be perceived only by our group.. we laugh on the joke that others may not even find a slight amusement out of it.. it’s like being there and forgetting about the world, for a moment.. and without me realizing it, I truly cherish them - the teacher and those high-school friends that have actually been rooting in me..

Twice in a year is the most frequent meeting with them.. but even so, there has never been a big problem of catching up with the group and I feel I’m always a part of them.. just like it’s always used to be.. maybe we don’t push it, but we’ve become the best of friends to one another.. maybe it’s nothing profound but it’s kinda grown into something so light that talking and finishing others’ sentences is a very natural thing to happen, which never fails to end up with a burst of laughter from which I am always an inch away to drop my jaw..

Saturday’s dinner has left me with a piece of advice from the teacher “Remember that u can never buy ur friend”.. a simple sentence that’s always taken for granted.. so cliché a sentence that’s easily found in those Hallmark cards.. nonetheless, it dawned on me afterwards, sometimes in a glimpse, what we had might seem easy to be exchanged.. but when regrets came, we’re hit by the fact that no matter how much we offered, apparently, we couldn’t be able to buy the same thing ever again..

Anyways, my short holiday this time has been filled with catching up with family, cousins and friends.. but these two are the only pictures that i have with me at the moment.. =P

Ciao...

That element called mystery...

2007-07-28T21:56:00.000+02:00

Mystery.. a situation that's very difficult to understand, nor to explain.. most people think that it's the quality of making something/somebody seem interesting and exciting.. well, to a certain extent that is true.. something that we look forward to find at the end of the day, something we're very curious about.. It's like, we're questioning all the time; what is it actually? What actually is happening? etc etc.. how can it not be interesting? but hold on, it can as well be sth much smaller than expected.. so how can it be that interesting??

When I'm given puzzles that's too hard to solve or when I have difficulty of finding my flight ticket that I bought one year ago (which I know I once deliberately keep somewhere so that it's easy to find).. there are pieces of mysteries that I really want to find.. and that's what makes it interesting (yet annoying after some time).. but when a person is trying to be mysterious to attract others or when I don't even know if there's even sth interesting to find at the end of the day.. that's just.. not interesting.. and I, I lose interest in no time.. I get bored easily too..

I like to really know what and whom I know, at least after a reasonable amount of time.. there's nothing interesting to always keep something that is mysterious in my life.. give me a year the longest and I will definitely give it up..

People are on their way of making life easier, and I am certainly one of them..

Summer.. oh summer...

2007-07-22T10:50:00.000+02:00

My imagination about summer used to be something that would be fun in any way, not the time for creating or working but it's like... ur body and heart would beg u to be outside, sitting by the beach near water somewhere, the time when u're craving for reading terribly lots of magazines while lying on the hot sand, gossiping with girlfriends, listening to mp3 players drinking cold beers pondering about how good life was.. there's nothing better, I thought..

Imagination has always been better than everything else, apparently and unfortunately I'm obviously not that type..

The good thing about summer in denmark, according to my experience was that, there's cooling wind apart from the bright sun.. but speaking of summer in italy, it was an "Ohh.. My.. God..".. (with Janice's voice and hand gesture =P) it was on average of 35-37 deg Celsius in daytime.. I mean, how hot was that..

A good traveling mate, nice weather, enough money to splurge.. three things to look at for having a perfect trip.. overall my trip was awesome.. like, I was glad to meet some friends again in other countries and to meet a lot of new people in hostels.. besides I kinda have got the momentum for traveling in europe.. for instance, the number of metro lines in big cities like Paris might be much more than what I've seen before.. but really, things turned out to be easier than I thought it would be.. and it wasn't as hard as said to find English spoken people, even in Spain.. so i was glad that things ended up well.. I sucked at map, but way much better after 3 weeks of wandering around alien cities with that thing.. =P

Perhaps ones of the unpleasant things would be the number of misunderstandings between my traveling mate and i.. and some unfriendly people that we bumped into, esp in Italy.. I mean, some of them could be really nasty.. the weather was extremely hot, I was unquestionably emotionally unstable.. basically I talked back, even to an officer.. well, I just couldn't believe I still had that part of me left inside.. haha..

Speaking of money, I'll be damned if I complain here.. although the amount wasn't that big enough to give me everything I wanted bcos I'm just human with a lot of needs =P.. it's at least enough to pay for all the necessary stuffs..

I had a thought after my trip, I realized there's one thing I actually hated all these while..

There are definitely some "great" people in this world, I know that.. the type that's so influential.. they change ur whole belief in a second.. I mean, even if that happens, or even if it happens bcos u're blindly in love with him/her.. look again at the person in front of u, a friend that u're talking to.. the person that u've known more than just one or two weeks.. is there really no way to just give a little respect? I just hate it the most to suddenly hear something from my friend that doesn't sound like her talking.. i'd deliberately drop the topic, refuse to listen further, that's what i do.. so i really hate it i suppose..

Ciao..

Time for goodbyes...

2007-06-30T01:22:00.000+02:00

To tell the truth, I never thought it would be this sad.. I focused so much on how sad it would be to throw myself back to my old life.. I never thought of how sad it would be let go the people, the place and the feeling of possession.. I failed to think of that…

It was only at Hui Jeong's bday party and Nic's farewell dinner that I came to realize it.. that was our jokes which were meant to be funny but turned out making nic's eyes teary that made my mind wandered to some thoughts later on.. going back to old life being put aside, sadder is to leave what is here right here right now.. the feeling to know that this place will no longer be the same place at the second u leave.. the people will no longer lead the same life as that when u know them.. even if u step back to this city again one day, u know u will never get the same kind of feeling anymore… this is only for once.. and that's what makes it sad the most..

Maybe I don't make the bestest friendships ever, but to have some people who try to get to know me more without any prior judgment.. and simply happily make dinner together with me and cheer me up without them realizing it, that's what makes my days.. Maybe biking around the city isn't as cool as driving a car, but I truly enjoy the experience of listening to my ipod, breathing fresh air at the same time.. Maybe I don't act as I always used to act, but that, I would say, is one of the most enjoyable things to be done.. So, this memory is precious to me..

Six years ago, even though I did not cry at that time.. there was one saddest farewell in my life.. and when that feeling seems to rush back again.. I know, this is going to be something that I should overcome with grief at the end of the day..

Starting all over again, again, maybe?

Dinner on the other day... before Ling, the girl from China left..Hui Jeong's Birthday Dinner...

Nic's Farewell.. Nic's picture..

Tomorrow will be emel's and my turn.. Till then.. Ciao..

Alcohol Allergy...

2007-06-26T23:39:00.000+02:00

My doctor will definitely have a smirk on his face if I tell him what happened.. first, I’m pissed off, how on earth could I have all this allergy stuff? How, how? I had alcohol allergy which never happened before.. causing terrible itch and red lumps all over my skin.. remember how good danish welfare system I said before? Well, I take that back.. I mean, it’s good to have a health insurance, et cetera, but hello…. having to wait for 3 days to see a doctor? that’s just insane.. I thought I was gonna die first bcos of the itchiness before I saw him… or, I would have cured by then.. for the love of god, all I needed was just an injection, how could it be that difficult? But o well, it's true - there’s no such thing as a free lunch..

I really had it hard this time.. I‘ve promised to stop drinking and eating all those forbidden stuffs.. thought of asking my dad abt what to do.. but then I held back considering he’d be suspicious about the amount of alcohol I took.. I mean, seriously, I really did drink just a little.. those who know me know how low my alcohol tolerance is.. fiuhhhh..

Btw, I’ve never observed this kinda thing, or maybe more like, it never really happened before.. it’s amazing to see people happily smiling and greeting u a lovely “good morning” in the kitchen making breakfast.. strangers smiling at u on the streets.. a good hug after not meeting for a few days.. in my dorm in nus, whenever I walk in the hallway and bump into people, more often than not, they’d pretend that they don’t see me.. but in here, people greet me and wish me a nice day.. the point is, I’m always somewhat dragged into a good mood, how can I not be anyway?

Actually, it’s not that hard to be a happier person after all… errrmm... hang on… I’m rather dubious if I can say the same thing 2 months from now.. u know, people change from time to time, depending on the situation they’re living in.. =P

“Don’t bother explaining coz the person who trusts you don’t need it and the person who dislikes you won’t believe it anyway,… right?” --> read this from Jacq’s blog.. it’s so true.. yet can be wrong I must say.. have u ever been in a situation when u feel that all u need is just an explanation? if u haven’t, well, at least I think i have =P

Teknisk Kollegium, my dormitory (back view)

(front view)

Surrounded by a huge park and beautiful view

Jan The Man, Chairman of the Larmer, the bar in Teknisk Kollegium

Ciao

Dead Poets Society...

2007-06-24T01:01:00.000+02:00

Keating: Just when u think u know something, u have to look at it in another way. Even though it may seem silly or wrong, u must try! Now, when u read, don't just consider what the author thinks. Consider what u think. Boys, u must strive to find ur own voice. Because the longer u wait to begin, the less likely u are to find it at all. Thoreau said, "most men lead lives of quiet desperation". Don't be resigned to that. Break out! Don't just walk off the edge like lemmings. Look around u"

...............
Keating: "I sound my barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world…"
...............
Keating: "There it is, You see, u have a barbarian in u, after all.." .
..............
Keating: Yes, we know that. All right. Now, I didn't bring them up here to ridicule them. I brought them up here to illustrate the point of conformity: the difficulty in maintaining ur own beliefs in the face of others. Now, those of u… I see the look in ur eyes, "I would've walked differently." Well, ask urselves why u're clapping. Now, we all have a great need of acceptance. But u must trust that ur belief is unique, ur own, even though others may think they're odd or unpopular, even though the herd may go, "that's baaaad..". Robert Frost said, "Two roads diverged in a wood and I, I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference." Now, I want u to find ur own walk right now. Your own way of striding, pacing. Any direction. Anything u want. Whether it's proud, whether it's silly, anything. Gentlemen, the courtyard is yours.

I immediately feel in love with the movie.. it expressed the idea of "Carpe Diem" which also what I first got to hear about one year ago in a talk.. an Academy Award winning film in 1989.. i say, u should watch it..!

Pictures as of late...

We've been having heavy dinners, trying out some recipes from internet bcos the weather's not been so friendly recently, always raining.. which makes it difficult to go outside to hang out.. =P

Spaghetti Carbonara - Fried Rice - Prawn Salad - Apple Pie

Besides, andreas is leaving on monday.. it's pretty sad and did i mention? he's a very nice friend and he's my bike angel.. =P always helping me with my bike.. anyway, we had a dinner and basketball game for the last time in Teknisk together.. quite a fun game, i teamed up with andreas, jun teamed up with jeong.. by the by, we've come to this gloomy time where everybody has to leave.. in fact, most of my classmates already left..

3 down, 1 more to go...

2007-06-20T00:10:00.001+02:00

Do u know what is it that has always been misunderstood by people most of the time? That there's a fine line between putting ourselves in others' shoes and putting others in our shoes.. think abt it, what's often done is the latter one.. but ppl always claim themselves doing the former one.. and they actually end up guessing the reaction of others based on how they're going to react..

So, instead of "if I were to be him", it becomes "if he were to be me"… but they don't really realize it, do they? Of course sometimes it does happen that people do the same things as we think they would.. but very often they don't.. each of us has different attitudes towards problems.. I don't necessarily react to something in the same way u will react.. and I don't attack people in the same way some people usually do.. again, just another thought of mine u see..

Anyways, I'm done with my last paper this morning.. I must say I'm quite confident abt it.. =P so, things are pretty much getting lighter, 3 exams done, just 1 final project presentation left.. not so pressurizing even though it's quite big bcos we work with a Danish company.. but then an email from NUS swooped in my life hunting me, FYP (Final Year Project) list was out! I was completely clueless scrolling through hundreds of projects with alien terms.. I tried to narrow down my options by eliminating those from madness namely fluid mechanics, bioengineering, control and applied mechanics.. I'm pretty keen on the projects from manufacturing.. but material science and energy & bio-thermal will do too.. I'm confusing u, am I not? well.. bcos I myself am confused too.. wrong move and I'll be suffering for a year.. it's not funny, it's concerning in fact.. btw, enough abt school.. =P

Ela, my polish friend, said "I was so caught up with project within the last three days.. I need nature now.. nature, please.." and there we were.. biking in a forest area.. nothing beat the feeling of breathing fresh air of the nature.. the smell of flowers and greens was terrific.. we speeded up as fast as we could.. the fresh air and beautiful view were just great..

Have I told u, nothing is perfect, but the nature somehow is..

Emel and I went to Rosengårdscenteret, a shopping place at the other side of the city.. and to Bilka (sort of a huge supermarket) to buy some foods bcos emel wanted to cook Turkish dish.. we tried making a chocolate cake too.. =P (yea, I definitely gain weight).. well, I'll just let the pictures talk..

but forget abt the whole process, we're both busy so nobody took pictures..

The result..... =P

Turkish foods

If u ever wondered, this is my campus, Teknikum @ Syddansk Universitet

The main building of Syddansk Universitet

When one is bigger than ninety nine...

2007-06-09T23:05:00.000+02:00

In this life, I suppose there'd be a time when we feel that we never know a man can be that happy, or vice versa.. when parents have their very first kid, most probably, they're at their happiest time ever.. the kind of happiness that's just beyond imagination.. but there'd also be a time when we think we never know that a man can be that sad, the kind of sadness that breaks our limit.. disappointment? Large-scale failures? A broken heart? U name it…

The unpredictable life is interesting.. yet at some points, depressing.. even an expected thing can bring us such kind of catastrophe we never expect to happen before.. perhaps we just don't realize the fact that as long as we breathe, we have hopes,.. and the thing is, even a tiny little hope is enough to bring us to our lowest.. and then, how if people say that u're too rational as a person? Even so, there's this small belief knows that there's no person who's fully rational..

We're just human.. we have imagination.. there are times when we could make the world appear better than what it is in reality by our own ways of looking at things.. and if it's easier to do it like that, why not? but sometimes, it's about this thing that we want so much it hurts.. it hurts solely bcos we know we can't have it.. and the saying that 'nothing is impossible' hurts us even further at a later stage.. it's a matter of that tiny little hope that lingers on.. when a 1% of hope is struggling to be bigger than the remaining 99%.. chances are, we're hurting ourselves..

So some say we better live for today.. the question is, who doesn't want? if only the thing that will happen tomorrow has nothing to do with what happens today, we would really love to live only for today.. why not? it's such a bliss to do that, in the sense that, it's healthy to put aside some things and delay the thoughts of them.. but the thing is, it's only when u know u will not live tomorrow that living only for today is making sense..

Just a small thought of mine.. =P

Anyways, here are the pictures of our pizza evening.. we tried to make some pans of pizza, but since the whole process would take quite a long time, instead of making the dough ourselves, we bought the ready-made ones..

The making process...

How the pizzas looked like after baked... and they're all tasty.. =)

Lastly, this is what happens when people play basketball and i don't.. =P

It's pretty obvious there are some luxuries that i'd never get to do during the exam period in nus.. hmmm.. actually it's bcos next exam is still far far away.. =P Ciaoo..

I felt like a kid again!

2007-06-07T21:31:00.000+02:00

How was it like?? Damnnn good.. =P

Say thanks to a carpenter who lived in Denmark long time ago who began creating wooden toys and called them LEGO.. well, to cut the story short, we went to the largest and oldest Legoland in Billund, Denmark.. there were 50 of us, but we’re kinda separated.. So nic, emel and I walked ard by ourselves.. seriously, we’re very impressed with all the Lego buildings, statues, miniatures, etc.. beware! I’m gonna tell abt the trip in details.. (just so that i won't forget in the future =P)

There were many rides inside.. so we chose the scariest ones (the only rides that fit us) first, the “MINI BOATS”.. it doesn’t sound scary, i know.. emel insisted on riding it, I asked her to just borrow somebody’s kid.. but anyway, it took us passing beautiful monuments and towns built of LEGO bricks, including Kronborg Castle, the Statue of Liberty, Osaka and the Acropolis.

“Vikings River Splash”.. we’re sitting inside a large viking river raft and swept down the river.. at the time we’re hoisted up an 8-metre-high water elevator, Emel started to scream like hell, the kid in front of me started to pray.. and then we water-fell 8 metres.. imagine how the screaming sounded like.. we took this twice..

Then we took the “X-treme Racers”.. Emel (who’s always a hero at the beginning) insisted on sitting at the front so I sat there with her while Nic sat at the back.. she screamed bloody loud until one point she did cough a lot (anyways, she’s still alive now).. the ride took us speedily up, down and around in hair-raising twists and turns.. the second time we rode that, Nic and I asked her to just sit at the back and scream.. =P

This “Lego Canoe” brought us to LEGO animals like pumas, bears, rattlesnakes, etc… and then traveled up to three levels and finished with a plunge down a waterfall at full speed.. again, we got wet..

The “Pirate Boats” where we could finally sit a bit more elegantly bcos nothing scary happened.. we sailed into Captain Roger's secret cliff cave, where the pirates are partying and fighting for the stolen jewels and treasure..

“The Dragon”.. unimpressive (that’s what happened when things were overrated initially).. just a little twists and turns with the view of life behind the scenes within an enchanted King’s Castle..

Here’s the time when we started entering the wrong places, first we’re excited about this place “DIVE to the Atlantis”.. there’s even a sign written “BOARDING every 5 minutes”.. Emel thought we’d be taking submarine.. that’s actually almost impossible I thought.. then again, in this modern world, what’s impossible?? =P

And there we were, they put us inside a room with a big-ass screen and asked us to imagine ourselves how it felt to be in a submarine, the thing was, at this age, it’s extremely hard to be that imaginative.. but anyway, we continued to see the underwater world which was quite nice..

We got into a wrong queue to “Timber Ride” fyi, it was nic’s fault.. it’s just three rounds of nothing and nothing happened and it ended just like that... just.. like… that..

Lastly was the scariest one.. the “Power Builder”.. a robot to program the exact ride we wanted.. it took us up, down and around in all kinds of crazy ways.. and when I said crazy, it’s really crazy.. Nic and I chose the combination of turns according to the numbers we liked and we ended up swearing a lot of words.. Emel, who first wanted to take lower level decided to ride the robot alone.. but she then changed to LEVEL 4 when we provoked her that she’d be the most boring person in this world if she chose LEVEL 1.. the good thing was, she didn’t swear, the bad thing was, she screamed.. and it’s fuckin loud.. =P

..and these are some pictures that i took..

That was another good day.. =) I’m definitely gonna miss denmark when I leave.. and exams? 2 down, first time in my uni life that i've passed with such flying colors.. =P (did i tell u?that's bcos i like the education system here).. so, 2 more to go..

Ciao…

Extraordinary...

2007-06-06T22:21:00.000+02:00

Some people are born with an extraordinary ability of driving u up the wall.. sometimes even until one point that u feel like stabbing them right on the spot =P.. and usually it happens when u meet a complainer.. and when I say a complainer, I really mean it.. basically, there was this guy (I've never seen any of his kind before, really) in my class who started to complain whenever we started a conversation.. the first time, on the staircase, I was unfortunate, I bumped into him.. he asked me sth and only god-knew-how he dragged me into his story about how he disliked staying in denmark.. and seriously, nothing from his mouth abt denmark was positive.. that was the first time.. from the way he bitched and all… it just gave me this unpleasant feeling..

So, it happened again and again I didn't even dare to look into his eyes whenever meeting him, sometimes I quickly took my phone out and played games (yea, it's that bad).. I was afraid he'd start dragging me into another complaining story-telling again.. but he always managed to do it (I told u they had a very special talent).. always starting from asking sth else.. and snap, u're actually listening to their complaints..

What's so irritating was that, this morning when I was so nervous waiting for my turn for the oral exam, he started to invite me into his story again.. I gave some hints by playing games.. or not answering at times.. he just didn't get it.. he's bitching abt the examiners of his English exam for being unable to understand his English.. and according to him, he's using American English (seriously people, It's not even close).. so it's all the examiners' faults according to him.. I nodded and smiled.. speechless…

Actually it's not only this guy in particular.. I don't know, but I think some people are just very good at driving u mad or filling u with anger.. they can do it with their words, or their strange behaviors, or sometimes by being very demanding, or with their so-called attention-seeking ways.. Not only that, they're even very good at maintaining their position in the chart of the list of people that u try to avoid.. sometimes they're even slowly climbing up from time to time.. sometimes they keep it stagnant, that is, only when u don't get to meet them.. or at times, they feel that they just want to get into that list and suddenly become so annoying..

Hmmm.. I just hope i've never done this to anybody, please forgive me and let's start over if I did.. Haha..

Quote of the day: "If A is a success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x; y is play; and z is keeping your mouth shut." -- Albert Einstein

Random Stuffs...

2007-05-28T22:59:00.000+02:00

Life is at times against us.. troubles come and go once in a while.. but it is just wonderful to know that our body and brain are still intact in this period of time.. I don’t know what it is that has begged me to rest and purge.. the laziness, the weather, or the fact that this is a totally different world to me? I don’t know, I don’t even care, I’m loving it..

It gives off a very strange feeling to know that somebody who seems to have almost everything everybody would ever need, feel depressed.. there’s always something to complain about.. we hear “reality hits” and we think “Aha, I actually thought that’d be the last thing to hear from u”… does everybody believe there’s something more to life regardless of what kind of life they have? a hundred people tell a hundred different kind of stories about life.. the question is, if there has got to be sth more to life, what is it?

A friend wrote “I’m 21 and I’m trying to act like one”.. how wonderful it is if our own selves could just grow without us trying too hard? I mean, natural is when the seeds grow on their own.. just water them if needed, leave the pruning shears behind.. we may just need to learn the art of doing nothing (interpret it as “less controlling”, not literally).. things may not happen if we do nothing (now, literally).. but sometimes, it’s only when we’ve stopped trying too hard and focus on one thing that the good stuffs start to happen..

I’m strangely feeling very good in this period of staring at screen all day.. no matter what it is in front of me.. a project, essay, movies or listening to music.. I’m in love with my laptop.. not in my calculator or a bloody thick heavy book full of calculus and stuffs, which btw is sitting on my desk right now, waiting to be read..

And what happened if u knew somebody else was holding the thing u thought u once loved the most? Actually nothing really happened except for the overwhelming sorrow, u might think so.. but sometimes, u just then got to realize that u no longer wanted it anymore..

Jeg Elsker Danmark...

2007-05-27T00:02:00.000+02:00

My Danish friend just taught me that, it means “I love Denmark” =P

It’s going to be the end of the semester in no time.. classes ending.. project deadlines approaching.. exams coming.. so there are some points about Danmark that I’d like to write before I forget..

Speaking of the weather, which took me quite some time to get used to.. I was just wondering how those dogs on the streets could stand the coldness and rains...
Speaking of the rains, ppl are fine walking in the rain without umbrellas..
And they love sunny day so much.. I do too, now…
High prices and taxes.. my lecturer said she paid 65% of tax before.. I myself paid 20% tax when I bought my bike..
Bikes everywhere.. with special lanes and traffic lights..
Teachers called by their first names..
Long day in Spring, even longer in summer (I heard so)..
Hatchback everywhere! all those cars look much cooler here..
Buy or bring your own plastic bags in the supermarket..
Ppl drink more beers than water I suppose..
A country with a very good welfare system, the danish get quite an amount of money every month even without working.. and I get a health insurance as long as I stay in Danmark!
Almost all Danish speak English (which maybe is not common in Europe)
Speaking of the danes, they’re very friendly.. esp the elderly..
The danes don’t talk that much (at least most exchange students think so)
Being on time is extremely important for the danes.. It’s an insult if u come late without prior notice.. i've never been late to any classes or appointments so far.. believe me,i hold the record for that now =P

I have quite a number of new pictures but I’m not gonna post all of them now.. next next entries ok.. =)

These are some of the nice people that I’ve been working with throughout the semester..

I realize that the one in the middle looks like my friend (it’s u dewi, yes you.. she’s ur European version..), maybe not so much on the face.. but seriously, everything is so similar.. I can’t believe she doesn’t even eat prawn too..

Ciao..

Too much...

2007-05-21T01:36:00.000+02:00

I always have a special fondness for people who are cheerful, I know that.. I am a kind who needs to be dragged into a situation, otherwise, I’ll be more than happy to send u into a time of stand still.. I can’t deny, apart from the idea that life’s not always positive, which I believe in, I’m trapped into a feeling of liking for people who are always positive.. what an irony..

But I asked myself recently, to what extent it was? an amount that’s just nice to make me fond of somebody.. words describe what we do and how we feel.. and by words, we judge how positive somebody is..

I’ve been hearing too much of positive words I just can’t stand it.. what happens to the excessive use of the oh-u’re-so-nice or the oh-u’re-so sweet? after some time, I am really getting sick of it.. If I serve somebody a cuppa tea, that’s bcos he’s a guest, not because I am very sweet.. and if I reply an sms, it’s just a courtesy, not bcos I’m very very nice.. seriously..

Maybe u think it’s bizarre that I’m bothered by such thing.. but I really think that is bizarre.. to the level that I really want to knock somebody’s head and tell him straight to his face that life’s not that positive after all.. I mean, smiles are fine.. jokes are very well accepted.. but shouldn’t them be placed only in certain circumstances? if we don’t know how to say positive things in an appropriate amount.. I’m saying if we really don’t know, isn’t it way easier to just stay silent?

In a way i can't explain...

2007-05-17T22:07:00.000+02:00

Time is really flying.. before I know it, I’m almost in the middle of the year.. recently, the thought of going back to spore is somewhat disturbing.. I think I’ll be very reluctant when it comes.. I mean, why not escape forever? (people, not in committing suicide kinda way ok =P).. well, I do miss my siblings and maybe some people.. but pardon my honesty.. apart from that, there’s almost nothing that I’m really looking forward to.. once, I was taught so many things at the same time I didn’t even know how to get up.. no other words could better describe the idea of throwing myself back to the same old thing except.. painful.. it is simply painful..

But I think I should have learnt some stuffs here, shouldn’t i? maybe I just don’t know how much it is and how much I have changed within this half a year… People say u just need to stand at a higher place and from there u will find urself looking at things from different angles..

By the by, let’s drop this and see some pictures.. =P

I lost almost all my high school pictures last year when my laptop fucked up (so, any kind bodies who’s reading and still have the pictures, please take the initiative..).. but I found this.. =)

Some things don’t change

Actually I mean, we still love bullying the second one from left =P

And Happy Birthday to the second one from right..

Norway trip pictures from other cameras..

Several attempts just to make the two last poses..

This is what we did, talking.. like this..

or this..

and taking pictures...

There’s one weird thing I discovered recently, I was extremely uncomfortable staying in small rooms (and i realized, i seldom stayed in small rooms before).. the cabin was really petite and only god knows how often I should get out to take fresh air.. on the way to egeskov, I was almost this close to ask the driver to stop just to catch some fresh air.. i'm not very sure what's going on though.. but now, i fear that i would have been developing fear towards small rooms.. do u think it had sth to do with the fact that i was once trapped in a lift when i was a kid?

Ciao…

The most expensive city...

2007-05-14T19:21:00.000+02:00

Weird.. It’s weird that I felt like home in a place that is not my home.. it felt safe when I stepped back in Odense.. It was after the Easter trip when I first felt this.. and yesterday, for the second time..

The Crown of Scandinavia was probably not as great as other cruises that I heard earlier.. but I could say, with the companies of other exchange students, the whole trip was an unforgettable one.. Alcohols were sold in the SEA SHOPS for quite low prices and that pretty much explained why some guys were wandering in the boat, talking non-sense, breaking glasses or shouting at one another.. We just shook our head listening to this English lady who approached us only to talk about her husband.. a Polish guy who usually looked serious came to our table and kept saying “Na zdrowie!” (Cheers in Polish) and forcing me to drink with him.. almost every 2 second he nazdrowied me and passed me his glass.. it was funny.. drunken people always did those funny stuffs and talked a lot.. I had a good laugh..=P

It took 16 hours sailing from Copenhagen to Oslo.. people spent time drinking in the boat, talking, playing games, sleeping, shopping, etc.. The Koreans, me and my two European friends just had a couple of beers and liqueurs, only one of us got drunk.. =P

We’re in Oslo the next morning and had a day-trip before sailing back to Copenhagen in the evening.. Emel, Nicolas and myself decided to walk from the City Hall, the National Theatre, to the Akerhus Fortress & Castle, along the sea-side looking toward Oslofjorden, back to The Royal Palace to catch the changing of guards in the afternoon.. We had a small picnic in the park before walking to the Oslo University, the city centre and walked back to the cruise harbor.. and yes, everything was relatively more expensive even compared to Copenhagen.. no wonder Oslo is the most expensive city for expats..

We’re back in the boat.. again, people got drunk.. blabbed and wandered around.. such life, such life is what they call pleasurable here.. looking at the overall trip, it was probably one of the best i've ever had.. =P

The miniature of M.S. Crown of Scandinavia

The interior of M.S. Crown of Scandinavia

Taking pictures from the deck

Have i mentioned that the sun only sets close to 10 pm at night nowadays?

The city of Oslo, Norway

Ciao...

Point of no return...

2007-05-09T23:34:00.001+02:00

What we’ve been doing all our life is to search for the things we’re lack of.. we don’t really know what we need to change.. we just know there are needs unfulfilled and go all that length just to look for them.. they ain’t that easy to get, sometimes we’re just not born with it, sometimes the luck isn’t there.. but we still focus so much on them only to overlook other things.. the whole purpose is not supposed to be harmful in the beginning, we just hope to feel a little bit better-off.. but it turns out that we end up hurting ourselves and others.. what’s fulfilled has often been taken for granted but when we realize it, it’s way too late..

We’re not lost, we never regret.. just laughing.. funny, we find ourselves standing at a point of no return..

We will get used to it...

2007-05-04T22:23:00.000+02:00

When I was at a very young age, there were two things I feared the most; somebody, whom I’ll not further elaborate, and going to school.. School wasn’t a fun place to be at, teachers were not as nice, they walked around with a weapon called rattan.. and if u’re not born to be one of the outstanding ones, that’s just it.. well, there’s also a possibility that I was not a very pleasant kid back then and maybe a bit weird on some level, I admit..

After some time, rattan was no longer a horror.. it didn’t matter which teacher standing and teaching in front.. after all, nothing was different.. seniors who bullied were no longer a monster.. once, we didn’t have the gut to fight back.. we got used to our own self instead..

Remember the time when those people in ur life leaving one by one because… I don’t know, they just had to.. they found new lives or they found new friends.. once, we were naïve.. we got hit pretty hard, didn’t we? yet, after some time, it didn’t seem to matter.. we got used to it, to the fact that people drifting in and out of our life..

There were times when we received rejection letters from the universities we applied to or negative responses from companies.. after such a long wait, we finally just ended up sitting and stoning.. how it felt when a hope shattered in a second, we knew it.. but we got used to it too..

The thing is, how painful all the things on earth can be.. although we will never forget, we will get used to it.. just make sure u get used to the right things.. no wonder most people don’t get what they can really be happy with until they die.. bcos they get used to the things they don’t like that much and they live with it as if they we can never be happier..

No wonder..

Finally I went to the Egeskov Castle… it was beautiful..

From the entrance toward the castle...

Here's the castle...

The castle surrounded by parks, gardens and museums..

Flaws...

2007-04-29T21:27:00.001+02:00

I admire them who live for the sake of others.. I admire them who leave the materialistic world and be compassionate.. I admire them who love their enemies.. I admire them who try to save the world..

Until today, i still find myself at a state where.. I don't have the energy to please everybody.. I don't correct people when I think they're at fault, I end up in silence.. I don't even have the energy to speak if something is disagreeable bcos i think we always have the options to accept it or not in the end.. I believe one of the elements towards happiness is if we are not financially tight.. I have material desires and I am happy with it.. I still can't afford to forgive easily.. I am not kind to everybody, only to those who deserve it.. I say harsh words at times.. If I'm hurt, I hurt back.. I treat people the way they treat me.. I don't try to understand those I am not keen on.. I ignore what I want to ignore.. and the most important thing for me is my beliefs..

I am just this imperfect..

Isn't it obvious? I adore those people simply because they're less ignorant than me..

One of the famous shots during the world war,by photographer Huynh Cong Ut..

This is the related writing that i took in Eindhoven..

The children had just left the temple when
the jets dropped four barrels of napalm and
four bombs. The entire area was engulfed by
a gigantic ball of fire. X. was hit by drops of
napalm. Howling in pain and tearing off her
burning clothes in agony, she ran towards the
photographer's camera and straight into history.

Does anybody understand u...?

2007-04-24T23:17:00.001+02:00

I hate it to hear "nobody understands me".. I hate it the most when someone feels that the world is so unfair for nobody understands him.. here's my thought.. first, please don't say it as if u're the most unfortunate person in this world.. if we're lucky, there may be a person or two who are willing to take their time to understand us.. again, if we are lucky.. that doesn't happen all the time in reality.. there are so many things in this world that can be taken care of, why do we have to choose to understand a particular person?

In an ideal world, there should always be understanding among human.. in an ideal world, there may not exist such things as starvation, murder or even simple fights between us and our friends.. but never an ideal world be real.. if nobody understands us, that is normal.. if somebody understands us, we're just lucky to have that person..

I know there are times when we think we have gone through more than others do.. again, that's just what we think.. it may not turn out to be that way in real.. how much do u think people don't understand u? that's just as much as u don't know about others too.. are we all not even?? aren't we?

Some ppl are definitely luckier.. sometimes u may even think they don't deserve the life they have, but that doesn't make u deserve what they have either.. even if u think u're the most miserable person in this world, that still doesn't mean u deserve their life.. if we think we're the most unfortunate one in a group.. I guess that's it.. most probably nobody can help us bcos we are already the most pathetic one, as we think..

Somebody said "nobody understands me" and I replied "so what??".. There are a lot of people out there that I can lend a hand to.. I'm definitely not one who pities this kind of person.. pardon me, but this is how nasty I can be..

One of my favourite shots, taken in the Netherlands while i was walking.. =P

Food Confessions...

2007-04-21T18:59:00.000+02:00

I’ve had confessions to make.. =P these are some of the forbidden stuffs that I’ve been getting a lot lately..

The doctor said no chicken and eggs for the next 6 months to 1 year.. I nodded and said yes..

I finished this half a grilled chicken very brutally in Aachen.. =P

The doctor said, please avoid dust, dirt and smoke, especially cigarettes..

Within the past 3 months or so, I’ve been a very active passive-smoker.. this is what’s on the table whenever I sit in the café/restaurant..

No cold beverages, including drinks, ice cream and cold fruits.. i told the doctor it was easy since i wasn't a fan of cold beverages..

And.. I’ve become a fan of soft ice and gelato since my easter trip.. this spaghetti-like gelato was so heavenly good.. =) but before I finished the half of it, my throat started to be itchy.. =(

I’ve also been drinking cold cola, cold juices, cold beer, u name it.. and eating cold fruits..

No tea, coffee and milk.. i said to the doctor, not a big deal..

But this Italiano cappuccino, I'm loving it.. =P

Nonetheless, this new habit is what keeps me healthy.. now I kind of believe “an apple a day keeps doctor away”... =)

Actually one of the things that helps me fit into the European society is that.. they say it’s very rare for Asians to have allergy.. it’s the Europens who usually have it.. haha yea ritee.. but anyway, is that true??

Life’s so good when it comes to good food.. i'm just human, i can't resist the temptation.. =P

Ciao…

For city with everything...

2007-04-19T17:57:00.000+02:00

When we walked out of the station, we're asked "want some vitamin?".. When we passed through one of the canals, we heard "wanna be strong?".. when we're checking out the Red Light District (landmark of the city) we're asked "wanna see sex live show??".. and when I swam in a crowded place, I smelled marijuana..

I was amazed.. "coffee shops" everywhere.. sex museums everywhere.. smart shops everywhere.. I couldn't help but smile when sightseeing the city.. It was amusing.. I was very surprised.. Think of any taboos.. u name it, they have it.. and they're all legal.. This big city offers such freedom no other places could ever afford to offer.. one word, unbelievable..

Like one dutch said to us, 'cos It's Amsterdam, baby..

Yeah, it's Amsterdam.. It did me no good, at all.. I can't believe what I had done there.. this is gonna be my last post here.. but before that, I just want to say, if u're asked to try, never try.. never do drugs.. after some time, u'll be dependent on it.. it's totally different from the disgust when u had ur first try.. it either makes u laugh at the slightest jokes, or pushes u into deep depression if u're sad in the first place.. but for sure u'll end up like me… posting ur very last post on ur blog..

I was looking and organizing my easter trip's pictures, searching for inspiration.. and writing about Amsie came into the picture afterwards.. well, I was tagged !! by this lady Jacq to write a post as if it's my last one.. and I should tag another 5 people.. but I think I ain't gonna do that.. I mean, u can't force somebody to be creative.. haha I was almost this close to not writing anything (and this post isn't a creative one either).. Nah, I always ran out of ideas when I deliberately pushed myself to write something..

So, gotcha?? (or not??)

Anyhow, Amsie was such a good place.. it was a unique trip.. but no, I'm not addicted to drugs!

When I heard abt the Virginia Tech massacre from a friend.. I thought it was just normal shooting incidents like those happened in the UK university that i heard or so.. curious about it, i read the Straits Times.. it broke my heart..

"There was not a shooting victim that did not have less than three bullet wounds in them", said Dr Joseph Cacioppo of Montgomery Regional Hospital.

My deepest condolence goes to all of the victims' family and friends..

The element of happiness...

2007-04-16T22:57:00.000+02:00

There are four elements which are conducive to a man's happiness in this world. The third element is one should have good friends who are faithful, learned, virtuous, liberal and intelligent, who will help him along the right path away from evil.

On a bus ride to Keukenhof, in front of me were these two old ladies.. I found it interesting and i'll tell u why.. they looked just like the two teenagers who sat at the other side.. talking to each other, sometimes pointing outside the window, saying something in dutch, laughing.. taking care of each other, one asking another to be careful when alighting from the bus, holding hands at times.. not being a stalker, i bumped into them again inside the Keukenhof garden.. they were enjoying the indoor flower exhibition..

I was inside the bus with 2 friends, we did laugh at times.. and i was also inside the exhibition enjoying the beauty of the flowers.. what hit me was that, i did all that with 2 people i've known for less than a year (one of them, I just got to know that day).. and these two old ladies....... most probably they have been friends for.... 50 years maybe?? This kind of thing never failed to amaze me..

When our hair turns gray, when we need somebody to support us while walking, when we’re seventy.. we might need a good friend to do that together with us.. therefore, act as good one and find one while u breathe.. =)

I miss my grandmother...

2007-04-13T01:26:00.000+02:00

When i was waiting at Köln Flughafen, my cousin and i overheard a conversation between an old lady and her two grandchildren, whom i supposed, were of the same age as mine.. She was talking in Deutsch.. telling the granddaughters that there were two bikes ready at home which they could use to ride around the city the next morning.. she looked so excited talking on and on, smiling at times.. the granddaughters looked a little annoyed though.. perhaps she was talking too loudly some people were looking.. i was, too.. i just thought it was beautiful..

I was too, like that.. i felt that i couldn't take it, to come back from school tired and should listen to my grandmother.. sometimes, she told me about the tv shows she just watched, which i had no clue at all about.. or the news she just heard, which also, i had no clue at all about.. to be frank, i was annoyed.. nonetheless, apart from all those, i missed her presence whenever i did not see her for some time.. no wonder, i had been living with her for almost my whole life.. she was the one who peeled apples and sent them to our room while we were studying.. she made sure the maids got our dinner ready before 7pm.. she took care of us whenever we were sick because our parents were at work..

Having gone through so many things, she's definitely tough.. i respect her, no matter what.. she could hardly remember what happened a year back but the amazing thing was, she remembered every single thing during the war times.. she told me the story, repeatedly.. but i did not get sick of it.. it was scary.. it was unbelievable that she survived.. and that slowly changed me.. i guessed she should be feeling lonely and bored.. why not? aged 84, spending almost all the days watching tv.. why not kept her companied for just a few hours?

Listened to her repeated stories would certainly not kill me, i told myself..

The Ferris Wheel...

2007-04-11T01:08:00.002+02:00

When i came across this Big Wheel in Öcherbend this afternoon... i came to think that it resembled the wheel of life..

Imagine u're on the ride.. when u're down there, u're dying to see how the world looks like from up there... and it is true.. u feel very satisfied once u reach that height.. but at the same time, there's this feeling of fear... fear of falling down, fear of losing the excitement, fear of being replaced.. nonetheless the wheel keep turning no matter what.. it becomes even more and more intense...some people crying out of fear, some screaming like going insane, some asking for more... all of them facing the fear and excitement, either alone or with friends..

People talk about it after the ride.. some laugh at one another, some try to calm their friends, some brought to standstill.. others might see u differently after the game.. u're judged if u're strong enough.. questioned if u dare to come back and take another round of challenge.. or choose to just play merry-go-round instead bcos it's much safer and doesn't give a big change of feeling from time to time..

This is what life does to us... we all hate to fail, or be disappointed.. but ironically, even in a blissful zone, we're somehow still overwhelmed with fears... it can be just a simple nightmare in slumber, but somehow, it ruins the whole good mood the next morning.. fear that thing would just get back to the time before we get to know a little bit of happiness.. or fear that we're still not over it..

In that case, I always think that i just need to learn one thing.. namely, the art of walking away...