The Cycle...

Are u afraid of repetition? Are u afraid of feeling bored about the things u like at the moment?

I am very certain everybody has heard about how high the divorce rate has been recently.. I mean, it was just yesterday when I heard that a friend’s friend was filing a divorce and that wasn’t even the first time.. I couldn’t help but wonder.. was it because of the non-existence of the novelty that once the couple had? or, people nowadays just couldn’t afford to take the time to solve problems, they gave it up instead? or, people are really in need of breaking the cycle, the repetition in life?

Whatever questions came to my mind.. unfortunately, the answers to myself seemed to be a YES.. that was upsetting..

Let’s take a very simple example of ourselves.. certainly there should be a time when u feel that u really need to start studying again or quit working, switch jobs, get out the city or worse, break up with ur current girl/boyfriend.. i’m expecting u to nod when u read this.. sorry to say that everybody does that, including myself at times.. we’d say out loud to the world that we’re just bored!!

I remember I was so happy being admitted to NUS.. so glad to go to lectures in the first week of school.. and BANG! On the fourth week, I found myself skipping classes, overslept and did all those sinful stuffs, until only god-knows-when.. I just wasn’t that excited anymore.. there’s no more engine to drive me “alive”..

Somebody told me, if we really think abt it.. actually there’s something special about being bored.. if in the first place u never have that thing u’re bored of, how on earth will ever be bored of it? and if u come to lose it, u may want it back again, not so soon but u may one day.. more often than not, we just don’t realize that we’re sick of the thing we once wanted so badly.. remember how cruel life was when u’re unemployed? And how blissful life was when u got ur first job interview? but how bored u are now in the office complaining at the same time? We simply take many many things for granted..

I guess he’s true.. it may be harder to see things that way.. but I say it is something worth looking at..

Till then.. Ciao.. =)

New Year's Resolutions...

Well, it’s that time of a new year start again to create the magic list.. the commitment or “life projects” to be fulfilled.. I even browsed back to my last year’s list and felt so impressed that I actually did fulfill almost perfectly.. Look, to me there’s no right or wrong in creating the list.. as long as it’s socially responsible, not too selfish and advantageous.. (ambiguous? but I hope u get what I mean =P).. so, to cut it short.. I do have some thoughts of the important things to be done this year.. some of which I’d share.. =)

1. Be environmentally responsible (including eat less meat)..
2. Learn something new
3. Help others
4. Get organized
5. Enjoy life more
6. Be hardworking
7. Exercise regularly
8. Continue to learn how to cook
9. Save some money (hopefully)
10. Tame the bulge

I actually just wish to be resolved to meet most of my goals.. for instance, I hope I’d not again fall into i'll-start-to-jog-next-month or i'll-start-my-diet-next-monday traps.. In other words, I can’t leave my time-frame too wide open.. maybe I should start setting the dates for mini-goals.. hmmm.. sounds pretty good, doesn’t it?

150 watches, 150 sets of stationaries, game gifts etc to wrap.. what a long day..

What a big relief! (dinner after gracehaven new year's celebration).. no photography and videography allowed there so i've got zilch of the party..

New Year's Eve

The chefs always have the luxury to take pictures together =P

All of us in 2008

The most effective way to get everybody to finish the leftover.. =P

Anyways, in this new year, 2008.. I’d really love to wish everybody in good health and may everybody be blessed with abundant joys and happiness.. =)

Till then, Ciao… =)

Holiday...

The long awaited and “well-deserved” break is finally here?? Believe me, some nasty people don’t really think we deserve this holiday!!!

It’s been more than 2 weeks since my very last day of exam and what have been happening…??
- Final Year Project (FYP), which doesn’t seem to go that smooth, changes here and there, manufacturing faulty… the list goes on and on..
- Workshops by the Office of Student Affairs, which have taken up most of my time too.. all of them were very inspiring though..
- Magical Workshops 4, the christmas party for the physically disabled @ Spore Cheshire Home like usual.. and additional outing @ Vivocity this year was a success.. it really brought smiles to our clients’ faces, literally..
- Gracehaven Salvation Army New Year’s Celebration.. this has been cool so far, did huge shopping starting from buying 150 watches, 90 sets of stationeries, game gifts, foods etc etc etc.. those are all for the orphanage, juvenile delinquents, those whose parents are imprisoned and so on.. this is my first voluntary activity without registering my name under any NUS Clubs, in other words we’ll do everything by ourselves.. the kind plan came from a bunch of friends and knowing that things have been smooth so far is really amazing.. the fund raise is surprisingly huge too.. I’m just so glad to have known many generous people who have big heart.. hehe.. at the end of the day, the talking is just the talking.. what matters is the doing.. =P any kind souls who want to donate, please contact me.. haha.. (I’m serious though) =P
- Christmas Celebration.. the first one was in Marlin’s.. that was great.. good friends, funny games and good food.. Christmas Eve yesterday was well spent too.. had dinner @Oasis in Hyatt and caught the movie I am Legend afterwards..
- Some unnecessary things did happen too.. such as me falling down in a very unmannered way while walking on slippery floor (all bcos of FYP) passing through a bunch of engineering fellows who were discussing and being free-entertained by me.. had a very bad headache which was extremely weird since I didn’t remember sth bad happened to my head.. weird weird weird!

Well, that pretty much sum up what I’ve done in the past 2 weeks or so.. strange because it feels so packed.. usually during holiday, I was completely bumming around lazily doing unproductive stuffs, eating and things like that.. apparently at one point in ur life, u don’t even have life anymore.. =P eh, I mean, u don’t even have a break (that u actually deserve)… but I’m really happy to be able to start my voluntary activities again.. not very happy to do fyp of course, but I have to, so it’s ok.. life goes on.. =P

Anyways, some pictures of late..

Christmas Party @Sherwood Tower by Marlin

Three of us, Lysia, Lydia and I =)

Vivocity Outing by NUS Rotaract Club

Dinner @Oasis, Hyatt

Last but not least, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year..!!

Ciao.. =)

Happy Thanksgiving...!

It’s thanksgiving today (I assume it’s today even though some celebrated last Thursday, I was having exam.. blah) and the year is again coming to an end.. this is how fast and scary how time flies.. yesterday night, I went recalling about the things that happened in the past 11 months... I simply felt very grateful for everything that has come to me in 2007.. and even if i had to think again about what happened in 2006, again, I merely felt very thankful that I finally found the reasons of what was happening.. thought of it, yes, it was bad but nothing was that bad after all..

Of course some shits did happen, even in europe and all that… then again, it somewhat just feels like nothing to me at the moment.. and I’m just glad that everything happened.. if I never left my $700 eurailpass ticket in the dormitory, I would never know that I’ve met such an angel whom without hesitate night travelled all the way from Odense to Copenhagen just to deliver the ticket to me, who even said “It’s ok, that’s what friends are for.. have a nice trip..”.. if I never wanted to bike in Odense, I would never know there was such a helpful person as Andreas.. u know what I mean? Just as the saying goes, every cloud has a silver lining.. believe me, even losing something could sometimes lead u to better days.. I realize we just have to accept and learn sth out of it at the end of the day.. nothing to be frown upon that long..

Yes, perhaps being in Europe is on my first list to be thanked about this year. (I have my own complete list, u should write urs too cos we’re talking abt thanksgiving ppl! =P). next thing to be thanked, of course it’s for all the people, family and friends who have been very kind to me.. and I’m grateful for our successful robotic project..

I just like it because I’m feeling that I’ve never been better… =) I hope u too..

On another note, there’s something more important to be blogged about.. a new NUS message that popped up currently on my screen every time I log in is “Fight Global Warming”.. yea, what I mean is, it’s time to stop being ignorant.. please do this people, of course if u care enough.. =P Exam’s finally ended for me.. feels very glad to have gone through the sickening mugging period healthily.. =P

A surprising bouquet that brightened up my boring reading week ;)

Oh well, how boring could it be? I had 3 funny and “crappy” friends who always mugged together with me during the week! haha.. =P till then, take care…

Ciao…

Back then and now...

The winners and prizes of the champion stacker competition has been announced!

As predicted, we won the 2nd place.. but hold on.. we also won the "BEST DESIGN AWARD" which means we actually get the same amount of prize as the 1st winner's…how much u ask?hmm.. I don't think I'll tell here bcos.. o well.. it's so small..! but it's fine.. we never knew they would actually give us money for winning the competition.. so what was the competition all about u ask? well.. I should say we did it for nothing but grades, module credits and PRIDE.. =P that's all..

So life recently has been treating me quite well.. project was pretty tough but I've met friendly n nice people to work with, which honestly seldom happened in the past 3 years haha.. except my HR group mates who are really cool and oh, my denmark mates.. =P anyways, exams are just around the corner.. reading week is one week away, exam is two weeks away.. simply put, I am not ready..

I am just so scared of one module, mechanics of solids.. this technical stuff, it's seriously not my cuppa tea.. and the fact that this is already my final year, which means my only chance to pull up my miserable grade.. (I mean it!) well.. life.. life… sometimes think of it, I just don't get it why I'm stuck in mechanical engineering.. I don't think I foresaw myself studying this stuff when I was 15.. the time when I was so innocently excited of being a psychologist, psychiatrist or a psychoanalyst (don't ask me the difference =P).. when I was 10 I wanted a camera so badly I cried.. so the first expensive thing that I bought for myself after breaking my piggy bank was a camera..! photographer should be a very interesting job, just so I thought… (don't laugh.. kids do dream).. can u imagine it's like every time I went to book stores, I went straight to those sections and browsed for some interesting stuffs.. I don't even have the urge to go to the library nowadays.. see the difference? u get what I mean?

Well, back then it was.. as time passes, things are becoming very different.. they're so different that sometimes I don't even remember what I see beforehand.. I don't even know what I love doing, what I'm good at, what are my interests..

Basically i lose, in both what i like and what i don't like.. simply put, pathetic..

Good weekend..! Ciao =P

The I-CUTE Day...!

First of all, pardon me bcos I’m so gonna brag about i-cute!! Basically we did it! I still hardly believe it finally ends.. well, not totally finished as we’re still left with the report to submit and final presentation… but the good thing is, at least we can boast a bit in the final presentation.. =P

We went early in the morning to run final testing before the competition which was @4pm.. it was a real demoralizing morning as i-cute never really did clamp 9 blocks and nicely put them on the platform as we expected during the testing.. (btw, this robotic competition was about clamping as many blocks as possible and stack them on a platform within 3 minutes).. the clamping suddenly became so jerky and shaky last minutes, we called it a “Parkinson’s disease”.. if Parkinson’s disease happened, we’re very confused of what to do to fix it cos it could be due to many problems.. so we basically did every single thing we could do but it still didn’t help much.. so we’re like… ok.. that’s it.. our hard work would finally end just.. like.. that… instead of grabbing blocks, the retarded clamps might just drop or sweep them away..

Last minute, we decided to “gamble”.. implemented another possible solution.. which was very risky it might just destroy the whole plan of our Programming.. and ended up with grabbing ZERO blocks, being laughed at and us crying our eyes out.. what a risk to take i know! but since the parkinson’s disease was so hard to solve.. we all voted for a “YES” to just take the risk.. turned out, we did the right thing cos the newly added battery helped preventing the jerky motion and the clamp grabbed super nicely, tightly and elegantly.. haha..

I think, my heart beats were three times as much within those 3mins.. i could even feel my hands and legs trembling and I’m not exaggerating.. it’s so intense.. we wanted it to happen so badly!! We wanted i-cute to run only once on the arena and left everybody with the “wow” feelings.. of course we’re allowed to do it again if we failed the 1^st attempt, but that just would not be as nice… right?? So, we grabbed 9.. there was one group who grabbed 12 (fyi, there were groups who couldn’t even grab 1 =P), but… they’re not totally autonomous (whereas i-cute was, no download cable, no wire from power supply, no nothing!) and I heard they did it only after the 3^rd attempt.. besides, i-cute was requested to be kept inside the design lab in NUS.. so we’re pretty proud of i-cute.. I mean, very proud.. =P

Mostly I’m feeling very satisfied.. bcos all our night and day shifts doing the project finally paid off.. we either woke up at 5am or stayed at school and came back at 9am in the morning.. the endless one-after-another-problem which totally drained us away seemed to be memorable now.. =P this, I would say, the only project which has taken the most energy n time..

Well, enough said.. just look at the pictures and there’s a video this time.. enjoyyyy =P

The iCute group @ our 2nd Home in Pavillion, NUS =)

The cutest robot girl, i-cute... =P Photo shot with supervisor and the group who grabbed 12..

Celebrated @Bosses Restaurant, Vivocity.. went for a pool game, arcade and drinks after that..

Last but not least, check this video! or this link:
iCute Competition Day

We were the only group that made people went "waaahhh..".. "hahahah"... "aaaah...hmm.." Ciao.. =)

The Robot...

I've never really wanted to talk about my robotic project.. because.. it is such a pain in the ass, it has caused so much trouble, it also has created many sleepless nights this semester for us all.. the competition is like a few days away yet things start to fall apart.. clamping servo spoilt, lifting mechanism doesn't work consistently, handyboard overheated.. u name it, i-cute has it (yea, we name it "i-cute", everybody says it's cute and the size is real petite compared to other robots)..

Perhaps luck would help this time.. but i don't think i-cute really has it in the past few weeks.. i can't believe it's that fragile.. i just can't believe this is happening.. i can't believe i'm sad whenever looking at it.. *sigh*

Ciao..

The Old Messages...

I have this old (yet durable) nokia phone which has been accompanying me for quite some years.. it was with me when I graduated from senior high school, when I was in Malaysia, in Singapore, in bintan, in denmark, in singapore again.. u see, how loyal this phone has been.. anyways, since coming back from denmark, my sleeping problem of having to twist and turn for up to 2 hours before sleeping was back! So yesterday, the same thing happened, I couldn’t sleep, I looked at that phone who’s always lying on my bed cos I only used it when my current phone died or when my new phone was stolen last year (shit!).. thought of deleting useless files/messages inside.. I ended up reading the old messages cos the first one actually caught my attention.. =P and I don’t know why I really wanna blog this.. haha..

U might not understand, so don’t try too hard..
“kepot kui.. blm packing tp bs jln2 ke brastagi haha ya udah gw nanya bege dolo.. loe harus ikut meskipun cuma nampang muka 2-3mins”
“diah, td mother theonis salah ngasi info, kalo masuk lewat pizza, lewatilah da shanghai, msk ke kompleks, nampak gedung bulet2, bersinar2.. ntar telpon aja..”
“diah bsr, diah kcl..ntr malam jadi ga? Jam brp kita mulai show? Urutannya kae kmrn ya.. btw diariku tolong diisi haha”
“diah bawa aqua cup ya.. haus.. masukkin ke tas.. haha”

Then I started to read another ones.. (I ended up reading all anyway).. they were all somehow funny when I imagined the person typing those smses….
“ Miz u di!”
“ayang, jam brp jemput gw?”
“happy birthday.. mai kong ce2 liao deh.. semoga bisa dapet uang, cinta.. dan sri darling senantiasa di samping.. muahahaha..”
“sunhong cinta, bae2 dsana..”
“haha ada donk.. Cuma lage sumpek aja haha… ya dah, u have fun, jgn kangen2 ma gw di..”
“di, alamat rumah loe dimane” (after knowing me for like 15 years, what a good friend)
“u at where now ar?” (she’s just trying to be funny =P)

These were the messages I didn’t even know when would be the next time I got them..
“hi diah, what about having a drink tomorrow evening at six? At quartier latin..”
“hi diah, when will u be in paris? I’ll be there next tues-friday.. we should grab some beers.. see you..”
“my friends and I will be waiting in front of Notre Dame at six sharp, see you there..”

I realized I missed them all so dearly.. I couldn’t help but turn the phone off and delete nothing… laughed instead..

Selamat Hari Raya! Happy Holiday, Happy Weekend! Ciao…

Do you...?

There was this event @ The Arts House at Old Parliament.. browsed through the art pieces created by offenders while serving their sentences, seriously, I would never think they’re the people who were imprisoned before.. besides and in fact, they were born with such gorgeous talents.. yesh! I was surprised by their art works.. nonetheless, it dawned on me that these ex-offenders couldn’t possibly escape the society’s judgments by passing themselves off as the “normal ones” while they're not according to our biased definitions of being "normal" .. they should have been considered apart from others in the crowd and looked different somewhat, just and just because they had prison record..

Totally, it was stunning.. I mean, if u ever thought how useless these people were to the society, u might want to think twice after checking out the exhibition.. I had a lot of thoughts running in my mind for instance, how much energy it actually took them to change? Some people just couldn’t be bothered to take their time to reflect and decide to change, if u know what I mean.. but these people did and they made it..

Perhaps the urge to be a changed person is stronger inside these people than that inside us.. why? maybe we do not make such huge a flaw that could alienate ourselves from the world.. I mean, we don’t need to put the effort to win back what we once have.. we don’t really know how painful it is to completely lose our loved ones.. or how aching it is to be pushed far away only bcos we've made a mistake once.. well, I suddenly feel so ordinary.. bcos u know what? That doesn’t even mean we’re morally better-off as a person.. we don’t even think that there's a need to change.. and the worst is, how self-centered we are at times..

So there I was, looked around, thought of it.. when walking out of the Arts House, I saw people painting and writing on the wall.. motivating words, admirations or messages to show that they were there to appreciate.. I held a marker pen, thought for a second.. there’s something I really wanted to write..

“The good thing about life is that… people change..”

Happy Mid-Autumn festival..!! =P

Ciao..

Messy Life...

There have been too many things in my mind lately.. the things that should be done, the shouldn’ts, the things that I can’t shake off my mind, the things that make me happy n sad, the things that I miss so badly..

Things happen for reasons.. I kinda believe in this saying now.. what used to be too hard for me to comprehend have actually started to tell one by one.. I miss some of my pasts yet I don’t wanna turn back time.. I kinda like the world I’m living in at this moment yet I keep comparing the past and the present..

Whenever I talk, wherever I go, whomever I meet.. I keep wondering why things can be that different in two places.. the things they ask, the things they’re interested in, the things they enjoy, the personality.. even trivial remarks they pass to me are so different.. just one question, why?

U may see me smile and laugh but I really hate myself for endlessly comparing my life in denmark to what I’m having right now.. u may not hear me say this in reality but I really miss everything abt it.. u may think I’m such a freak who doesn’t know how to get over but the thing is, what remains in mind is always much more beautiful than what’s happening right before my very eyes..

Every so often, I even laze about and lose the direction of what I’m supposed to do.. Monday to Friday, morning to evening, I seem to have plenty of time yet I find myself so lack of time.. I’ve spent half of this semester worrying about my passport which is expiring soon yet the indo embassy doesn’t allow me to renew, I go back and forth trying to convince them and do whatever it takes.. how can I not miss denmark? and I’m so sick of sitting in front of my laptop making drawings using solidworks, even worse, when I have to edit again and again once I show them to the supervisor.. I feel that everything I try to solve lately is just trivial matters that have been deliberately made complicated for no reasons.. besides, I feel that I’m totally back in the place where people seem to be having a thought that the world just revolves around them.. in other words, they think they’re always the main interests of the topic on the table.. u think how can I not hate it?

Well, this is what happens when people mix two worlds in one life.. we just can’t have both.. and for once, I feel that my life has been pretty messy…

I’m loving this blog.. I feel relieved after writing this.. =P

Anyways, it was such a great experience to freelance as an interpreter in Batam.. stayed in a decent resort, ate decent foods that we've been craving for.. and nice outing too! =P

Holiday Inn Batam Resort and Delima Seafood..

Edina, me, Patrick, Erick

Catching up on weekends

Gathering + Dinner + LS & SM Birthday Celebration

Ciao...